Quote Originally Posted by Lux71 View Post
I feel my depression has made me look at what really matters to me in my life, I think that's because IV had this terrible sense of time passing and I panic and feel sad in case I'm not spending enough time with my kids, or my family and the people that matter. It's like a meloncholy and I get it every morning when I wake. I hate going to work because it's time away from my kids and I don't think it's normal to feel like this, obviously it's the depression. I don't think this is a strength, but it's made me realise whats important to me in the big scheme of things...x
It's strange that I find many strengths with my depression (or whatever it is) that I don't wanna lose, I feel like I can be engaged with people (who are already close to me) much more while I am depressed since I can listen much more and be more open about my feelings or whatever goes in my mind, while being normal can make me live in a bubble focusing into details or not looking at the big picture, it is like if being normal makes me impulsive/excited which can make me full of delusions. This is just strange and I am not sure if this will go with time or not

---------- Post added at 20:39 ---------- Previous post was at 20:29 ----------

Quote Originally Posted by Lux71 View Post
Hi just checking in, Im 3 days short of week 4. Had an ok couple of days where my anxiety was fairly low. Still feeling very flat and not interested in anything, finding it hard to even smile sometimes. I find it an effort to want leave the house also, it's like the normal everyday things of showering, makeup and hair is just too much. Sleeping is absolutely terrible hence why im on here at 6am. IV been taking zopiclone to help but it was only a short 7 day prescription and my doctor was really hesitant at giving me these. IV got 1 left, so worrying how I'm meant to get to sleep enough so I can get up for work the morning after.
Yesterday I was ok up until 1.30pm then anxiety started again. It lasted the rest of the day into the night and was sat on the edge of my bed taking deep breaths during the night.
Does anyone else find their anxiety springs up on them out of nowhere during the day. Half the day I spend ok, the next half can feel crap. My mood changes from 1 minute to the next also, Ill be feeling really negative and in total despair then I have a sudden shift to feeling lighter and more optimistic. These don't last long though and I'm back to feeling low again literally minutes after.
I suffer with terrible sinus problems at the moment so this is also having a huge impact on how I feel.
Everyday I take my flux I think 'another day down' I'm waiting on the day I feel brighter and happy, more my old self.
Just keep going and you will eventually feel better. I also had troubles falling asleep and using Melatonin really helped with that (maybe you should give it a try), I take 4 mg 1-2 hours before bedtime and it made my sleep much better. Also, try to stick with a strict schedule with sleeping & waking up times and your body will eventually adapt, exercising helps as well. Also, I sometimes take Modafinil (it is a prescription medicine used for sleep apnea or shift work sleep disorder), it is a wakefullness-promoting medicine and it really helps me to get rid of my brain fog and keep me focused on my work for extended periods of time, it affects people differently so I don't know how you will react but maybe you should consider it and ask your doctor about it.

Keep going guys, we all will be happy at the end, I promise