Dear All

I am desparate for some tips on how to survive Xmas, it brings out the worst in me, and I'm always physically ill. This year I've also managed to shoot myself in the foot as well as chopping my nose of to spite my face - let me explain .....:(

My dad died four years ago, so Xmas is always a bit miserable, but I try not to get too down. Xmas day usually involves me going to muck out my horses, having a glass of champagne and opening presents with my friends where I keep my horse, calling into the local pub for a very swift pint, to hug all my friends, then home to open presents with family (sister, her fiance, my gran and mum), with a sherry, then lunch about 1.30 - 2.00, followed by walk (mum/sister) and the Great Escape (gran/sisters fiance/me).

However ..... LAST YEAR my mum invited her new man (the Ex Dentist). And declared that lunch would be at 3.30pm. So we did our thing, and sat around, and our stomachs rumbled, and rumbled, and I snuck some Ferrero Roche in for me and Steve, and mum caught us and said we'd ruin our lunch, which resulted in the obligatory Xmas argument.:( The Ex Dentist finally arrived at 3.32 pm, where upon we all shot into the dining room. Mum asked if he'd rather sit down and have a drink first, but luckily for him, he decided to join us in the dining room. We ate our starters (which we never usually have, and were horrible, we just had them cos mum was trying to be posh infront of the Ex Dentist), and he sat and looked at his and said he wasn't really hungry!!!!!! My sister held her fiance back, whilst I whipped the starter plates away, and fetched in the turkey!!!! (No gap between courses - how rude). Anyway, we finally finished eating about 5.00pm.

As my sister, her fiance and myself were washing the pots, it transpired that the Ex Dentist HADN'T been visiting his two children, and their related off spring, showering them with gifts, and passing on festive cheer as we thought, whilst we sat and starved. NO - HE'D BEEN ON A BLOODY PUB CRAWL TO HIS LOCAL BOOZER AND THE GOLF CLUB THE $*£()&%!!!!!!!!!

Then - and bearing in mind this was the first time during Xmas we had had a male at the head of the table since my dad died, he got out a video of his dead wife for us all to watch as our lunch went down. Obviously she was alive when the video was taken - it wasn't one of her dead in the coffin or anything, although he did have her embalmed after she died? Before she was cremated? Logically - why? Anyway, I digress .....

Fortunately my sister and fiance had to be at his sisters at 6.00pm for tea, and I had a horse whose hoof had an abscess and needed polticing, so we made our excuses and left.

To cut a long story short, I threw a tantrum, and declared that I was cooking lunch, to be served at my sisters house at 1.30pm, everybody welcome.

Now it's approaching I have realised that

1. Won't be able to drink on Xmas Eve
2. Will have to have an early night on Xmas Eve
3. Will have to get up ridiculously early to do horses on Xmas Day (or do in evening)
4. Will have to forgo meeting best friends in pub

I'm getting stressed already!!!

The only plus side is that I have found out a load of videos of dead horses I have competed on, so have informed my sister that we shall be watching these after lunch!!!!

My mum however, is already trying to push the time backwards to accomodate the Ex Dentist and his pub crawl. My sister and her fiance will be leaving at 5.30pm anyway to go to his sisters, so they don't want to eat too late.

But already it's getting too much and it's not even December yet.

How does everybody else cope - I keep saying to myself its one day out of 365, you'll only be awake for about 18 hours of it, so just calm down, but it's not happening.[?]

I can't drink either, because of having to drive round the county.

Help !!!!


Charlie