When are we having a league table for muppet behaviour? I feel I have a good chance of winning.

I have had steady toothache all day, but this afternoon it felt so damn painful, I had to stop working and pace up and down like a man with bad toothache.

I know, I will call the dentist I thought (I am quick like that). Now, I hate dentists. Don't get me wrong, if you are a dentist I don't hate you personally, but to be fair you need to have a good, long hard look at yourself, what kind of person wants to stare into peoples mouths for a living ?

Anyway, they said call tomorrow, I did explain I might die of pain in the mean time but she laughed and said call back tomorrow (all I need, a sadist receptionist).

So, sitting here, feeling like my jaw is being pulled by a gorlilla, and being far too responsible to down a few whisky's at 3 pm, I thought I need to sort this.

So lets google toothache, what harm can it do? I tell ya what freakin harm it can do, 1st website listed the causes (I am not a complete numpty, I was after what to do whilst waiting for a dentist).

Most causes are to do with sensitive teeth, tooth decay, cracked tooth abscess, (yer yer I know all this), sinuses, impact, heart attack, drug abuse, teething, gum disease

WOOOOOOOOOW what? Heart Attack?

Back up here, heart attack? what muppet listed heart attack?

Come to think of it, my left arm was tingly.

Right get a grip, take a couple of nurofen, gargle with salt water and ride it out like a man (ok, a man terrified of dentists, heart attacks and tax bills).

Right relaxed? no not really. I know,I will take my blood pressure. don't ask me why .

o look, 170/101 WHAT?

Right, beta blocker, get one down me right now.

An hour later, I take my BP again, 134/80, cool I can live with that. Hang on, pulse 52 ? Ain't that supposed to be like around 60 plus?

2 and a half hours later I have calmed down, my toothache has gone (for now) and my hearts still under 60 bpm.

So a warning, feeling fine to toothache to near panic all in the space of a couple of hours and all thanks to google

That site should have a health warning