Hi All,

I would like to start by saying hello. I'm a guy that suffers from panic attacks that had my 1st one in ages... This time going to try and get to the bottom of it...
This is the 1st time I have decided to ask for help and try and explain my problem in total. Be great to hear back from someone.....

Basically I think I need help with a panic disorder . 9 years ago while in College I took some ecstasy that was laced with LSD… I had the worst night of my life… 8 hours in my own room in the dark in total and utter fear…
The next morning though I was ok. Some days later I experienced the same fear again though out of the blue… For some reason I tried to battle this fear without telling anybody. I did not do well but managed it and things gradually got better.
Over these last 9 years I have had numerous visits to doctors regarding Depression & Anxiety but mainly Anxiety . Over the last year I have had some good success dealing with my Anxiety by taking Xanax prescribed by the doctor.

During the 9 years I have had an irrational fear of “tripping” or of LSD…. I think this is the cause or root of my panic disorder. I think irrational or illogical things like maybe there was LSD in the meal I have just eaten or LSD might have somehow been in my drink. This can give me a panic attack where I start to feel the very intense fear I relate to tripping. This seems to happen randomly to me but maybe there is a pattern, I dunno. This has recently happened again even though the last few months of my life have been the best in a long long time. I now feel very bad, desperate. These panic attacks seem to wound my body and mind deeply each time they happen. After the latest one 2 weeks ago, I now feel like adrenalin is constantly pumping through my body. It leaves me in a constant state of panic and very jumpy etc… At night it is the worst trying to get to sleep. It feels like I am going crazy. My thoughts do not feel my own… It’s like some one has shaken my memories & thoughts in my brain like the snow in a slow globe and they are just randomly flashing in front of me. I honestly feel like I am having a nervous break down.

I went to the doctor yesterday but did not manage to say any of this to him.
I just managed to get one months supply of Xanax which is taking the edge off but I have taken 5 in the last day and a half where before I had not taken more than 1 in a day. Not sure where this is going to end…

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