Hi i am 46 yrs young / old (i am stuck inbetween) i started with my very first panic attack 26 years ago . 12 hours affter taking a couple of puffs on a joint - marajana my very first time - going around a retail park i started to feel strange / clostrophobic -no air just had to get out.
out side the shop i waited for my wife when she arrived i was all ready in a state of hyper awereness /my surroundings /my body/ my feelings/ everything . driving home - now i must state i am a very good driver... i can get lost in a box. take me to the corner shop i would get lost i have no direction what so ever. people mention to me lets go to balckpool on the m62 of the m48 turn left on the a164 over the top of my head havent a clue . how people remember this crap i havent a clue all i know is my cumpass is broke- full stop / sorry for rant back on track driving home - heart pounding, numbness in tounge,back off neck , stomach feeling twisted and distorted ,clambiness to hands, tunel vission , feels like i am dieing -having a heart attack- will i crash / my wife / my daughter/ what do i do / i dont want to die/will i kill them when i crash / will i survive- more and more and more faster faster /BLANK/ all i remember is my wife pulling the stering wheel to the kerb myself flopping to the floor a passerby in a car stopping me getting in and going to hosspital

4 hour later told to go home all fit and well

as soon as i steped foot in my farthers car it started again

i have had councelling / the poor bloke was in a worse state than me
they tried me on medication / i wont take it -will i loose controlle if i panic will i be able to handle it and keep it in check and so on

i have had c.b.t. / well enough said 1 talk on a phone per 14 days wasnt going to work .
now on the 1st march i start a panic control class . 1 time every week for 2 hours i am keeping an open mind .

all the other training i have had / i kow they cant hurt me/ but putting it into practice is different.

also now my panic has spread in to other forms aswell .medication i wont take anything other than paracetamol ,i wont go to the dentist will i go in to anaphalactic shock with the anathetic
fear of dentist.s period ,
and my latest which is getting me down big style fear of choking . i have no top set of teath so have to chew very well by the time i have finished chewing there is so much syliva i am choking . i am taking 1-2 hours to eat a meal. and end up swallowing so much air that the pain starts the whole system off again pain in chest -heart attack -panic

well thats my misserable lot