Lysanthe thanks for posting this.
When I did drive on motorways I would get scared and have to come off at a junction and I would also lose vision. It then worsened to the point I avoided motorways and dual carriageways.
I had citalopram for a while and CBT and then I learned to drive on dual carriageways and even as a passenger on motorways and dual carriageways. I didn't enjoy it but I could go through it.
Over the last few months its come back - mainly when I'm stressed or tired.
I too have the impulsion to jump out of the car if I'm a passenger on a motorway or dual carriageway. Tonight I tried to go on a motorway with my wife driving and me as a passenger. By the next junction I was leaning over almost on her lap while i hung onto the handle above the door. I was terrified. Luckily my wife is really understanding.
It happened at a railway station recently when a train passed through, and I had to walk into a cafe to get rid of those thoughts. I was terrified I would lose control and jump in front of the train although I am not suicidal in any way. I love life.
It happens in a tall building. I'm terrified of the windows and hate being up high in a building bcause of the fear of jumping and losing control. (Even though I don't want to).
I can't even go on holiday on a plane - can you imagine what it would be like if I had the same scenario at 25,000ft?
When I watch films or TV programmes or even during business meetings sometimes people say something that triggers me to visualise something that then makes me anxious and i flush red with shock and get nervous.
I don't quite know what to do now. It's hard to hide it from friends and co-workers, and I know it must seem like madness to some.It has been a relief to know there is someone with the same symptoms.
The treatments previously haven't worked and I really don't know what my next step is or what to do. I'm scared I'll be wrongly locked up for being suicidal when it's the last thing I would do!