Hey All, I don't post in the ocd board a lot as my ocd is much more under control than it used to be, however, over the past couple of years my anxiety levels have increased mainly around my health and I've started having a few thoughts which make me worried my OCD is on the rise too:
I've always had this I intrusive thought that in my most private moments and even in my thoughts my dead relatives can see what I am doing and that they get to decide what happens to me. I sometimes feel they would be cross with certain things I do, especially revolving around sex and my husbands cross-dressing. This has now morphed into me feeling like I have to do things to "balance the scales" and also wondering if all my health stuff is punishment.
I also have this thing since I was a kid I have been told I look like my grandma and this has played on my mind. I also have hair thinning at an early age like she did as well as gallstones and PCOS. I feel like I am destined to also get cancer like her and sometimes I feel like it's not my own life which scares me.
I also get intrusive thoughts of them
Decomposed in their graves and imagine hearing them telling me to do things or that bad things will happen if I dont.
While I recognise many of these things as OCD thinking I had at the peak of my OCD I'm starting to wonder if I am loosing the plot again 😞