New job, feeling really low
I started a new job a week ago. It is my first full-time, big-kid job as I graduated from college in December. Last week, I was super excited about this new position, the responsibility, the chance to gain some skills, and of course the paycheck - it's not much (at all) but it's enough that I should be able to move out and support myself.
This week, though, I am in a major slump. On the one hand, I feel like I will never learn all the particulars of this position and that the responsibilities are incredible. Yet on the other, it's not a position that really requires a degree but I took it because 1) it was the best offer I had and 2) most jobs that required a degree ALSO required additional experience which I figured I could attain here.
It doesn't help that I had to leave a student worker position (because I was/am no longer a student) that I LOVED. There was an administrative position in that department that paid slightly more than my current one and I could have stayed with all those awesome people, but I didn't take it because I figured something new was good for me and I thought it would be humiliating if I applied and then was rejected since I knew everyone there so well.
I keep telling myself if I took that job I'd still have regrets, but I don't know.
I'm sure this is just a reaction to change and all the extra work being put on me; I remember feeling similar in some previous jobs I've had at the beginning. I also keep telling myself that I can do it for a year or two and then move onto something else if I need to. I also have the option of working on a graduate degree for free as long as I'm employed here, so that's another good option I can pursue.
I'm just feeling really, really low and needed to vent I guess. On the plus side I get to look at apartments on Friday; I was really excited to do this last week but now have convinced myself that they'll probably all be terrible and it's all for nothing.
__________________
On the road of experience, join in the living day. If there's an answer it's just that it's just that way.
When you're looking for space and to find out who you are...When you're looking to try and reach the stars.
It's a sweet, sweet, sweet dream; sometimes I'm almost there
Sometimes I fly like an eagle, sometimes I'm deep in despair.