Originally Posted by
Fidget
Hi Tamo. I so understand how you feel. I took early retirement last year at age 57. I'd had enough of the rat race and wanted to declutter my life and find inner peace. Sold up and moved to rural France, where the air is clean, lots of space, peace and tranquility. I've had "flirtations"with anxiety and depression for most of my adult life, and indeed have really struggled in the past. Last time was 8 years ago when I eventually decided I needed medication as I was really struggling with depression anxiety and panic, and had been on citalopram since. Last year I started to wean myself of the meds as I felt so well, and eventually stopped in March. Anxiety back 1 month later, and despite resuming meds, I cannot find relief. In fact I feel like I have been through hell
I am seeing a cbt therapist. She posed the question based on my discussions that my previous work life was so full-on, and my down time was also consumed with pursuing personal goals, that I never learned to relax. I used alcohol every evening to help unwind, a practice I continued here in France.
Perhaps after 40 years of work and daily stress, we have simply forgotten how to relax, and be comfortable with simply being with.....me. I know I am struggling to be with me, I suffer terribly with intrusive thoughts which cause great anxiety for me. I am trying to learn to let them go, but it's not easy. I have found that when I am distracted , I am calmer, so perhaps finding occupation is an aid to recovery, but I believe the real solution is to find peace from within. I suspect this will be the biggest challenge I will face. All the best