I want to know about you guys who feel recovered. Something I keep telling myself is 'recovery is not linear.' Have you found that you've had to updose? Do you feel like it was all plain sailing after a certain point or did the Venlafaxine change things more slowly.?...I've slumped into eating junk recently, which I'm now reversing, and am keeping up my exercise routine. Also trying to get as much fresh air and natural light as possible. And sleep, although my sleep is a bit disturbed.
I would go mad if I didn't go to work at 2pm but I guess it depends on what you do. Its the stress of being out in rush hour traffic delivering meds to care homes that focuses my mind and the Ven has made this quite a calming thing for me, its now very slightly stressy but just enough to stop intrusive thoughts. Its when alone that my mind will turn on itself.
I started on two doses of 37.5 twice then eventually moved up to 225 extended release. Also take 75-100 amitriptyline and occasionally 5mg diazepam. I think recovery is such a subjective state. I don't feel I am recovered and don't think that I'll be anything other than in recovery. So much depends on your circumstances. My GAD/Depression is the result of an abusive upbringing and PTSD. Sadly that's never going to change but my approach to it can.
The venlafaxine at my dose keeps me stable as long as I avoid certain triggers...excessive alcohol, certain family etc.
I did take Mirtazapine for a while but I pilled on alot of weight so I know how you feel with the food situation. I craved junk food and chocolate.
Talking therapy also gives me coping strategies to deal with the anxiety.
^ Amen to that. I've usually found the "crashes" come after the stress. I think the adrenaline keeps us going until it's over, and then we hit burnout. I'm really sorry to hear of everything you've been through. I'd be wary about going back to work, and really make sure you're feeling better before you do. Sometimes I envy people who have jobs where they can sit in an office and crack on with computer work etc, although I may be wrong. When you're client-facing, regardless of the exact job, it can be tough to put on a brave face. Jo - I'm so sorry to hear about your work. Definitely do contact CAB when you feel up to it.
'If you're going through hell, keep going' (Winston Churchill)
Thanks @chimpingtongb and @Dying_swan, really good to hear your experiences. It really does help.
With regards to work, am already part time, but am still gonna ask if they can phase me back in. I went back too soon in July and undid my progress.
Now, I've just said I'm signed out til the beginning of October, and I'll check in with you again at that point.
They keep saying 'we'll support you' but I'm asking them HOW. Words aren't enough really. I need to have some kind of plan of action in case I have a panic attack etc. In front of the kids, that wouldn't be good.
That's a great idea to make a plan in case of a panic attack. Its very different for me because I just pop into work load the van then I'm off on my own and only interact with staff at care homes briefly so when I was getting panic attacks at work I would just pull over have a silly panic then get back on the road. The horrible stress of trying to look normal in front of people when inside I am freaking out and feel terrible isn't such an issue but it must be twice as distressing if your at a work place where you can't just walk off.
Yes, that's exactly it...and often in school, there's no quiet space to retreat into. I think I'd just have to lock myself into the loo.
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