Re: I'm so lost now I don't know what to do
Originally Posted by
NickyUK79
I can't handle a days work now. I just feel like an empty shell, no sense of self and emotional.
I know that vibe only too well..
I need to exercise but the block I've got going on is huge.
I all but stopped going out a few weeks ago but we have a puppy and she needs to be walked, so it's on with the coat (hers and mine) and out we go. (She's helping me and she doesn't even know it).
No social skills at all that can contribute to a conversation in the real world . I've been like this since I was 18. 25+ years later I'm still no better. NO kids, not married, not interested in getting out to meet people. Isolation is always there, not so much loneliness.
Did something happen to you before the age of 18? (trauma etc).
I keep thinking of how many past has lead me to now and what my future holds and it scares me to death. What's worse is I can't help myself to improve. My family are getting fed up as well.
You can help yourself, Nicky. As Joe says, you need to start small with your basic needs. Make sure you eat regularly and get some exercise. Stay hydrated. I know how utterly insurmountable it can seem to open that front door and go out into the world, but biology says that you will benefit - even if at first it doesn't appear so.
I'm sorry that your family are not supporting you as you need them to, but the bottom line is that people can't fully understand something they've not personally experienced.
That said, I don't believe that we have to have personally experienced something in order to support someone who is struggling...
I am the proverbial 'time-traveller', either stuck in a past that I can't change, or fearing my future. When I fixate in this way, my heart rate flies up and I feel all those horrible emotions such as irritation, fear, panic, despair. It helps to ground yourself. Make a cup of tea. Walk around your garden (if you have one). Go for a ride on your bike. If you love how it feels for you to be on the bike, try and focus on that rather than the effort it's going to take for you to walk through the door and walk to the garage etc..
Have you ever had any therapy for your issues? (Have you ever been psychologically evaluated?)
Finally, no matter what you think about yourself, you're not a failure. You've come on here and you are sharing what you're going through. That's being proactive. Because people will support you and help you to help yourself. You're doing something, and that cannot be failure. (But I absolutely understand that it feels that way to you).
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A thought is harmless unless we believe it.