View Full Version : Hospital
My life is over :weep: :weep: . My doctor is phoning the CMHT to send me to an eating disorder unit.
She said if I don't agree I will be sectioned. She won't change her mind and I'm supposed to sit here and wait for it to happen.
My weight is too far from where it needs to be to avoid it. I've had it :weep:
Karen xx
:hugs: :hugs: :hugs: :hugs: karen I really don't know what to say. I know from a medical point of view they are doing what they think is best, I know this is so hard for you to understand.
Stay safe darlin and I look forward to you returning stronger and healthier than ever before. Your advice on this site is invaluable don't lose site that you help so many and everyone is here for you. Just as you give there are so many here to give to you.
Karen, even a short spell in hospital doesn't mean we won't all be here for you when you return. Don't worry Karen, I am lighting a candle to see you through.
lots of love always Sax x
Thank you for letting me know straight away so I wouldn't be wondering.:hugs:
Hun your weight is now so very very dangerously low that your doctor just can't ignore it as she has a duty of care towards you.
I know this is not what you want but the alternative doesn't bear thinking about.
What are the arrangements and when will you have to go - if you let me know where then I can stay in contact with you during your stay ok.:yesyes:
Love Piglet :flowers:
Oh Karen, I feel for you so much :hugs::hugs::hugs:
Although it is probably what you need to help you to overcome your problems, it must be so very hard for you when your control over things is taken away from you.
It will, however, be much better for you longterm if you voluntarily agree to being admitted rather than being sectioned.
Hoping so much that things work out for you, Karen.
Lots of love Kate xxxx
Karen,
Just wanted to send you some :hugs: :hugs: :hugs: mate, stay strong and remember they are doing this for the best and to help you.
Love
Trac xxx
Hi there Karen,
I know it doesn't sound like it to you, but your doctor has your best interests at heart. And yes, this will do you good in the long term, but will be painful in the short term.
When we get bad, whatever we have wrong with us, it is usually painful at first but it pays off in the end.
There's nothing more I'd love to see than for you get some kind of normality back in your life. And I still believe this is possible.
Just want to send you loads of positive vibes your way.
:hugs: :hugs: :hugs: :hugs: :hugs:
just wanted to send some :hugs: :hugs:
anx xx
Karen sweetheart, I know how much you don't want this and you say your life is over, but I think sunshine that it is far more likely to be the case if you didn't agree.
I can honestly say I can see how hard this is for you and I am thinking of you so much. However sunshine, I want to see you alive to fight another day.:hugs:
Happyone
xxx
Oh dear Karen, I'm really sorry hun.
I know it's so hard for you right now, but I'm sure like everyone has said, your Doctor has your best interests at heart.
I know it will be tough, but you will come out of this a stronger person.
I don't suffer from an eating disorder myself, but I've had friends who did, and I know how difficult it was for them.
If you can just hang in there and stay strong this might do you some good.
Thinking of you hun, and sending lots of hugs. :hugs: :hugs: :hugs:
Love and hugs from shoegal xxx :flowers:
Thinking of you Karen:hugs: :hugs: :hugs:
Luv Kaz x x x:hugs:
sending you hugs karen
luv debera:hugs: :hugs: :hugs: :hugs: :hugs: :hugs:
groovygranny
09-11-07, 20:09
Oh Karen,
I'm so sorry this is not what you want, and I can only say what has already been said.
There are times when what we want isn't what we need...... and times when what we need isn't what we want. This occasion is obviously the latter of the two.
As Piglet says, the alternative to voluntarily going for this stay just doesn't bear thinking about - and we all want what's best for you.
Sending you lots of love and hugs
http://th178.photobucket.com/albums/w263/kattekepoes_album/th_BigHugsforYOU.gif
:hugs: :hugs: :hugs:
:flowers:
honeybee3939
09-11-07, 20:30
Karen
Im thinking of you hun, and sending you lots of love:hugs: be strong:hugs:
Love
:hugs:
Andrea
xxxxxx
:hugs: :hugs: :hugs: :hugs: :hugs: :hugs: :hugs: :hugs: :hugs: :hugs:
Thinking of you, be strong.
:hugs: :hugs: :hugs: :hugs: :hugs: :hugs: :hugs: :hugs: :hugs:
Has there been any news of Karen since she posted this???
Piglet???
Anyone???
Luv Kaz x x x:hugs:
Thank you for all the messages of support. I don't know when it will happen. My doctor told me wrote to them tonight to assess me next week.
She said I cannot do it alone.
I pleaded with her and said I'll really try to gain weight this week. I want to give up but Nigel is encouraging me to eat more.
I'm concerned though about being to eat enough whem I've been having only 200 calories at most per day.
Will I get refeeding? Nigel keeps suggesting things like build up drinks or Complan but that is a bad idea. I cannot eat lots of bulk so now I'm thinking of anything that has calories but isn't filling. Those are probably too much.
I'm in a panic :weep: I'll do it for one week but maybe that's all I need to stay out of hospital so I can do it properly. I don't want loads of really bad and gfattening stuff.
Karen xx
nomorepanic
09-11-07, 21:05
:hugs: :hugs: Karen :hugs: :hugs:
Sending you good luck wishes and I hope things work out for the best for you.
Take care
Karen,
The build-up drinks might help. I have another condition which causes me to lose weight sometimes, and my Doctor told me to use them to help keep my weight up. They are just a powder that contains all the nutrients you need and you add them to whole or semi-skimmed milk. They are quite nice and you can just take sips slowly throughout the day. They won't make you feel too full if you drink them like that.
Also, fruit is a good way to eat something without feeling too full. Have you tried any of those 100% fruit smoothies? They taste gorgeous and are good for you too.
I know you will hate this suggestion, but when I feel a bit light headed I sometimes eat chocolate because it makes me feel better quickly, and doesn't make me feel full up.
If you are brave enough to try a proper meal, salads, omalettes and fish are very nutritious without making you feel full.
Good luck with whatever you try hun. I know it's really difficult and I've got my fingers crossed for you.
Love and hugs from shoegal xxx :flowers:
Hey Karen:hugs:
Nigels idea sounds spot on!!!
Complan isent bulky just strawberry or whatever flavoured milk or you can mix it with water its 250 cals a glass!!!
However I personally dont think you should try and gain to avoid hospital.....it either has to be a long term thing or not!!!
Please keep us posted and take care
Luv Kaz x x x:hugs:
Hi Karen,
Sorry to hear this sis :hugs: I know you do not want to go into hospital. However I also want you to get well and healthier and you can't go on as you have been as you are at a very dangerously low weight now and barely eating. To be fair you have made alot of effort this week with eating but you still need to be eating more so maybe you do need professional help with this now. To be honest I worry what will happen to you if you carry on as you are and don't get the help - I don't want to lose you and I'm sure no one else does :hugs:
Eating more and Nigel's suggestions are good but like Kaz said it needs to be a long term thing not a quick fix to stay out of hospital. Even if you stay out of hospital now, as soon as you lose again you'll be back in this situation again so this needs to be a long term commitment ideally.
I don't particularly agree with you being admitted just for refeeding however - yes your body does need calories, nutrients and to gain weight BUT you so desperately need some proper help with the root causes of all this and the medical issues you now have too. I hope if you do get admitted you get proper support this time, you so deserve it.
Whatever happens I hope it works out for you, and if you are admitted let me know where you are and I will keep in touch like I did last time ok :hugs: Whatever happens you can do this, it might not be easy but it will be worth it if it gives you a better quality of life. Let's be honest the way you are now and the anorexia is making you very miserable and unhappy and your life could be so much better. I just want the best for you and for you to be well and happy :hugs:
Thinking of you :flowers: You have so many of us behind you, supporting you and there for you.
Lisa x
Karen have a big hug from me hun :hugs: xxx
I can only repeat what Piglet said go voluntarily being sectioned is even more of what you don't want hun.
Other than that all I can do is give you these:hugs: :hugs: :hugs: :hugs: and Cherubs Kisses you happy.
Keep your head hun tell them exactly how it is, don't hold back, tell them that you cannot eat bulk they must have had severly underweight patients like yourself before.
Come on fight it get well and be strong.
:hugs:
Just saying night night hun. :hugs:
Love Piglet :flowers:
just coming in to say I am thinking of you hun:hugs:
happyone
xxx
I'm thinking of you too :hugs:
Lisa x
I wish you well. You deserve help and support with your problems and your doctor wishes you to have it, which is good, although i know it doesn't feel good to you. I am sending you some :hugs: :hugs: :hugs: :hugs: :hugs: :hugs: too. Please let us know how you are getting on.
Complan is a good idea or something like build-up or fortisip too. They are milk based too. There is also a fortijuice, still has good stuff in it but no milk.
I hope you are ok today.x
How are things today Karen, have you managed anything like the complan idea of Nigels at all?
:hugs:
Love Piglet :flowers:
Thank you all for the messages and support.
I've had a busy day - going out shopping for some food. I don't know that I've chosen wisely or bought anything good for me really.
Piglet - I have been eating but, no, I haven't tried Complan or anything like that.
Today I had cereal and skimmed milk for breakfast. I had a Nutrigrain bar, which was a bad choice and some fruit.
I'm not sure what dinner is going to be. I've got about 30g cooked cod loin in the fridge but don't really fancy that. I've got broccoli, a couple of small potatoes but I think that might be filling.
Also got a sweet potato but no idea what to do with it and it is probably filling.
I've got so much 'bits' of food that I'm stumped - fruit like strawberries and grapes.
Activia fat free fruit yoghurt. Low fat rice pudding. Bread. Cheese. Tomatoes. Peas. Tin of spaghetti. Eggs.
I'm stumped :ohmy:
Karen xx
Looking at what you have in, could you manage a cheese and tomato omlette? Nutritious and not too high in calories, also has a bit of protein.
Look after yourself.
Thanks Joe. I have no idea how to make an omlette :wacko: And nothing to cook it in.
Egg isn't a bad idea I guess :shrug:
Don't know.
Karen x
bottleblond
10-11-07, 19:56
Hi Karen,
Just wanted to send some hugs your way :hugs: :hugs:
Love Lisa
xxxxxxx
Jo's right hun you could do with some protein in there somewhere!!
Sweet potato is delicous roasted but I don't mean like you and I had last time you were here. What I do now is peel it and chop it into cubes and put it in a small roasting tray, I then chop a carrot and a pepper and pop those in too (infact you could use many other veg) then I add a splash of olive oil with some fresh garlic added to it (you could leave the garlic out) and a splash of water and bung it into the oven for at least an hour on gas mark 5.
You could add a small amount of grated cheese sprinkled on top for the last 10 mins and that would give you some protein and calcium. The beauty with that is you can just do a small portion - I find that most satisfying and gentle on the tum.
The fruit is super but you do need some binding type foods or it's gonna slip right through isn't it - what about toast and anything you care to put on toast, cheese would be good, beans, egg etc etc. If you can't do omelette do boiled egg and soldiers then.
Well done for going out today and buying these things and well done for posting to let us know how you are going - if they are great gaps in posting people worry!!
Love Piglet
good suggestions from Piglet there hun:yesyes:
Did you manage anything?
Night
happyone
xxx
Hi Karen..
Sorry to read about your current situation.
I wish you well lovely..
x
Well done for going shopping sis :hugs: I hope you found something to eat in the end. You seem very determined to try hard which is good to hear.
Thinking of you :flowers:
Lisa x
Well done Karen:hugs:
Omelettes are good.....
Small frying pan
Small knob of butter or spread or veg oil
whisk with a fork 2 or 3 eggs and a splash of water
heat pan and tip egg mix in
use a spoon or fish slice and pull edges to middle
put topping on
pop under grill for 2 mins
put on plate and enjoy!!!
Its really easy once you have done it
And healthy not too filling etc
Take care
Kaz x x x :hugs:
Dying_Swan
10-11-07, 23:28
Hi Karen.
I don't really know you but have read some of your posts before.
Just wanted to send you some big :hugs::hugs::hugs:and to wish you the very best of luck.
I was going to suggest Fortijuice (which isn't milky so not as filling as Complan etc) but Angie took the words right out of my mouth.
Take good care of yourself hun xxx
Thank you for all the replies and suggestions.
Piglet - Thanks hun - that sounds nice except I don't have half of those things - not anything to cook in, let alone the other veg - wellI could borrow some carrot from Nigel before he goes but don't have the other stuff. It does sound something I could try though if I figure out a way to cook it.
My OCD and eating disorder makes keeping cooking pans and dishes difficult and I use disposable foil trays for Nigel when he puts things in the oven, which he hates a lot as they get thrown away :ohmy:
Kaz - Thanks for the recipe. Omelette sounds nice (minus a few things like oil :blush: ). I've got no frying pan either.
Part of the problem is my OCD and eating disorder means I find it impossible to keep and re-use these things.
I ended up with cereal again because I couldn't choose :wacko:
Any help appreciated. Maybe I need some different foods.
Thanks everyone :hugs:
Karen xx
You could just do the sweet potato on it's own.
Obviously you are going to have to get some cooking utensils in if you are to make a serious attempt at making yourself nutrious food - there is very little way around this, other than to buy ready meals that you can put in the microwave for now.
At present I would just concentrate on the getting food into your body by whatever means possible but obviously the OCD stuff does have to be worked on at some point cos it's so intertwined now with the anorexia - it might be better if you were to work towards eating off plates etc rather than Nigel eating off foil trays.
It seems to me that because OCD is the result of mainly irrational fears (and we all have our own little versions of this don't we :blush: ) it's may be a better approach to keep this in mind and for the sufferer to keep trying to live normally, rather than the people around us living our OCD way if you see what I mean.
Love Piglet :flowers:
Lindalou64
11-11-07, 12:21
Hi Karen I Really Dont Know You Just Seen Some Of Your Post I Just Want To Wish You Well Hun ..........linda Xxx
Piglet - Thanks hun :hugs:
I didn't mean I make Nigel eat his food from a foil tray :blush: I meant he brings things mainly like ready meals and other stuff that just needs to go in the oven like chips, etc and I cannot deal with the reusable oven dishes, sauce pans, or any utensils etc. I don't have any of those things.
He does have a plate and stuff like that.
Whereas I use all disposable plates, bowls and cutlery. I'm trying to re-use these now a bit but it is hard.
This morning I didn't want more milk having had cereal and milk twice yesterday. I had some wholegrain flake and fruit.
Lunch? I don't know - maybe a sandwich? I can only eat one slice of bread at the most though.
I don't have any oil. Would the sweet potato roast like that? Does it still need a splash of water? I can add carrot and maybe a sprinkling of cheese as you said. A foil oven dish would be ok wouldn't it?
Thanks hun :hugs:
Linda - Thank you :hugs:
Karen xx
Well I haven't tried it just with water but I don't see why not - give it a go!!:hugs:
Love Piglet :flowers:
Piglet - Thanks mate :flowers:
Karen xx
Hello Karen,
I too must say that I don't know you, but I am sorry to hear your having such a ruff go of it.
If I may suggest something to you: Can you get the plastic dishes over there : they are made by Glade here in the states, you can put them in the microwave. If so,then you can make scambled eggs in the microwave. Also you could boil/cook your vegs. in them also.
I will keep you in my thoughts hun, I pray that things improve real fast for you.
How's today gone mate. :hugs:
Piglet :flowers:
Hope you have managed to eat a bit today Karen:hugs:
As Piglet said if you are going to try and eat better you really need some kitchen utensils!!!
Maybe scald them in boiling water when you have used them
Or keep them in the car if you are not happy with them being in the flat:shrug:
But you cannot eat healthily if you have no utensils!!!
Also buy a small bottle of oil for cooking with......oil is good for you try a tiny bottle of olive oil....that way you can cook so much more!!!
Ok I will shut up lol
Luv Kaz x x x:hugs:
Hi Karen,
How are you getting on today? I hope you've managed to eat something. Think about all the ideas I gave you on facebook too - I nearly wrote you a whole book of ideas lol so there must be something there you can try :winks:
I agree with the others you need pans and utensils :ohmy: You don't have to get loads though, you can start off small with just a few things initially and see how you get on.
Thinking of you :flowers:
:hugs:
Lisa x
Kazzie - I would never tell you to shut up :hugs:
I know you have my best interests at heart and you right but facing hospital the way I am I don't have time to think about that. I need to be safe here first.
In the long term I do need to do what you say. I'm not eating healthily right now. It is a struggle to eat anything. I get too full.
Tonight I feel stuffed again :weep:
I know I need to eat if I have any chance of staying out of hospital but I find it so difficult.
Karen xx
Hi Karen,
I just wanted to let you know that although you don't know me, I have been following your posts and I'm thinking of you hun.
It sounds like you are trying really hard with the food. :yesyes:
Well done. :flowers:
Love and hugs from shoegal xxx
Thanks all.
Believe - I am sure there are microwave plastic bowls available if I had time and money to buy them.
Lisa - Thanks sis :hugs: I find it difficult to eat a proper meal. Preparing food is a nightmare :wacko:
Shoegal - Thank you. I am trying to eat.
I've had a lot today - cereal, fruit, cheese and tomato in one slice of bread, part of a tin of spaghetti hoops, a yoghurt. I cannot eat more.
Karen xx
Well done for what you managed today :hugs:
Lisa x
Thanks sis.
I've been in a really bad mood and I am angry at myself for eating.
I'm finding this so hard :weep:
Karen xx
Aww sis :hugs: I know it's so hard for you. Try not to be angry at yourself for eating, as eating is what your body needs and you're doing well to manage some food :hugs:
Thinking of you :flowers:
Lisa x
honeybee3939
12-11-07, 15:16
Hi Karen
Just wanted to say WELL DONE hun for trying so hard:hugs: I dont often reply, because i dont realy know what to say, Just wanted you to know though that im proud of you for trying so hard.:hugs:
Love and hugs:hugs: :hugs:
Andrea
xxxxxx
Karen,
You are doing brilliantly. Please don't feel bad about eating food because like Lisa said, it's what your body needs. I know this must be a total nightmare for you as it goes against what your illness is telling you to do. But I promise you, with the right help, you will be able to beat this!
You're doing so well. :yesyes:
Love and hugs from shoegal xxx
Lizzie1975
12-11-07, 19:16
Aww Karen - hate that you're in such a bad place again - make sure you take on board what everyone's said - you CAN beat this - things DO get better but it takes a supreme effort unfortunately from us to make it that way.
One thing I try and do even when things are especially bad for me is to do normal things in the hope that eventually they'll feel normal again and eventually they do.......does that make sense?
Hang in there precious, be strong and take any help offered. Lots of love and hugs,
Lizzie XXX
Well done Karen:yesyes:
Luv Kaz x x x:hugs:
Thinking of you Karen :hugs:
Lisa x
PS I meant to say I will not be posting here tomorrow as I am seeing my chiropractor and need to be careful with my posture for 24 hours afterwards so have tomorrow's hugs now too :hugs: :hugs: :hugs:
I will be thinking of you even if I don't post :flowers:
Lisa x
Thank you for the support and encouragment from everyone. It does mean a lot :hugs:
I have had a difficult day. I have eaten but 'bad' food - all junk. This is getting out of control. It will tip into bingeing and then starving myself again :wacko:
This is out of control - like refeeding. I am being forced to eat and I'll still end up in hospital.
Karen xx
Paddington
13-11-07, 13:27
hello my friend:hugs: i know i put lists of stuff on face book..but i have just had a thought [ouch!!:wacko: ]..what about wieght watchers ready meals??You just micro them or bung them in the oven!!All calorie counted as are the desserts..guilt free puds[well if there is such a thing as guilt free!!:ohmy: ]Also slim fast shakes and soups..i know they have all the nutrients one may need in a days worth of food and two shakes [or smoothies]and a soup adds up 2 600or so cals..so doable i would think..or two shakes and a ready meal will have you gaining hun..but in a gentle un bloating way..just a thought hun.May seem daft suggesting 'slimmimg' food to some one with anorexia..but calories is calories folks:) ..you doin a grand job my friend and as you can see we are all rooting for you:hugs: Love as ever Paddie.xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
You are doing really well Karen. Don't give up.
Thinking of you. :flowers:
Love and hugs from shoegal xxx
Keep up the good work Karen- every little helps
Linda xx
Karen hun, you can always come here and I will cook for you, you have not mentioned any of this to me yet again!!!
Am I your friend or not????? If you don't want to come here just text me I will cook you something and run it up to you for heavens sake don't start shutting me out again!
:hugs: :hugs:
Tell me what you want and I will do it but I am NOT a mind reader:hugs:
I guess at the moment coming here is out of the question as you can't drive but you can text me.:hugs: :hugs:
Hiya Karen!
I know it must be hard, but please look after yourself and eat as much you can plus just a little more.
It may be painful, but it will do you good. Any by doing that, you will also get more people on your side!
You know we all luv ya on here!
:hugs:
Hi Jac hun :hugs:
Karen hun, you can always come here and I will cook for you, you have not mentioned any of this to me yet again!!!
I am sorry :blush: . I don't want to keep bothering you particularly when I don't know what to ask for. I find it very difficult to make food choices. I am not blocking you out on purpose.
What do you suggest? Can you make some suggestions? I am so confused my head is in a spin :wacko:
Am I your friend or not????? If you don't want to come here just text me I will cook you something and run it up to you for heavens sake don't start shutting me out again:hugs: :hugs:
Of course you are my friend. We have been friends for a lifetime almost. I love you lots :hugs:
I need help with knowing what to eat.
Love Karen xxx
Thinking of you Karen :hugs:
Lisa x
Thank you for all your support.
I'm sorry I didn't post yesterday :blush: It was a difficult day for both me and Nigel. Right now I hate myself so much for eating and choosing food :weep: It is so wrong :lac: I want to throw all the food away and stop eating. It's like I am bingeing :weep:
Paddie - Thanks hun :hugs: I couldn't manage a whole ready meal I don't think. Most of them contain meat too. I am supposed to be eating 900 calories a day to gain Meg told me and I'm getting close to 500 some days now. I am sure my weight is going up :ohmy:
Also slim fast shakes and soups..i know they have all the nutrients one may need in a days worth of food and two shakes [or smoothies]and a soup adds up to 600 or so cals..so doable i would think..or two shakes and a ready meal will have you gaining hun..but in a gentle un bloating way..just a thought hun.
Yes people keep suggesting drinks but things like Complan and stuff. I think it is over the top.
Ray - Thank you. I am eating more. In fact I feel stuffed all of the time now.
Shoegal - Thanks hun :hugs:
Lisa - Thanks and hugs for you sis :hugs:
Thank you Linda :hugs:
Thanks Paddie you are so kind hun :hugs:
I'm sorry I didn't post yesterday :blush: It was a difficult day for both me and Nigel. Right now I hate myself so much for eating and choosing food :weep: It is so wrong :lac: I want to throw all the food away and stop eating. It's like I am bingeing :weep:
I've eaten so much today. Cereal and fruit for breakfast. A slice of Weight Watchers bread toasted with cheese on one half and jam on the other. An Alpen cereal bar. I've got cod loin for dinner but I'll only have about 30g at most and because I don't want fish with potato and vegetables. It is too filling :ohmy:
I feel otherwise though, if I have all milky things and yoghurts etc that I'm already in an EDU. So I can't win. Don't know what to do :huh: I can't cope. I feel I am bingeing.
Karen xx
Hi Karen,
you sound like you are doing really well,
love anx xx
Brilliant progress Karen:yesyes:
Hang in there eh????
Thinking of You
Luv Kaz x x x:hugs:
honeybee3939
14-11-07, 19:49
Hi Karen
Sounds like you are trying real hard,WELL DONE hun, you keep at it we are all thinking of you and sending positive vibes for you too.:hugs: :hugs:
Love
:hugs:
Andrea
xxxxxx
Brilliant progress sis :hugs: :yesyes:
I know it's so hard for you but keep up the good work, it really will be worth it in the end.
Love and big hugs :hugs:
Lisa x
Thank you all for continuing to support me.
Dinner was not so good. I had one very small baby new potato and two very small pieces of broccoli but I made up for some of it with half a pot of rice pudding.
I'm doing it all wrong though. I can never make good and healthy choices :huh: I get completely stuck.
Tension here is bad tonight and not due to my problems for a change. I've tried so hard all day to have meals without a fuss. I didn't take hours preparing and eating my meals and I didn't pester about going shopping for something different even though I wanted a different dinner.
But still things are going wrong and I want a break from it. I want to sleep now.
Tonight I won't get any sleep. I feel really down and depressed right now :weep:
Karen xx
Aww sis :hugs:
I hope you get some sleep tonight :hugs:
As for the food, just keep trying each day, you are doing well :hugs:
Lisa x
Paddington
15-11-07, 09:03
hi Karen,remember hun,that if folk are guiding you in a certain direction..it is for your own good,and for your health hun:flowers: No matter how frustrating..and i can feel your frustration thru the post hun:ohmy: ..please take the guidance and carry on doing what you are doing,which is very well:) I get your point about the milk shakes hun..they do a nice smoothie..mango i think it is..i should know really as i have several in my fridge:blush: Thinkin of you hun bun.lovePaddie.xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Thanks Lisa :hugs:
Paddie - Yes I'll have a look at those drinks. Thanks hun :hugs: The tension here is still bad. I had a phone message on my mobile that I think is from the CMHT and I'm scared.
I'm also scared about seeing my doctor tomorrow and her still telling me I need hopital.
I am also scared of dinner. Baked benans will hurt my tummy won't they?
Karen xx
Karen hun, :hugs:
Sounds like what you are eating is fine hun. Neither are you anywhere near binging. A normal woman would eat about 2500 a day, so you have plenty of room to eat more without over eating.
It must be hard for you as you've not been eating properly for so long. Keep up the good work tho hun.
Jim:hugs:
honeybee3939
15-11-07, 21:06
Karen
Your still doing well hun, keep trying:hugs: :hugs: :hugs:
Love
:hugs:
Andrea
xxxxx
karen , put your trust in the help your getting , they know whats best for you. Have you ever thought about putting some mindfulness into your eating ? It maybe a great help ? Basically letting go of the thoughts that hold you back.
Your doing really well by the sounds of it ,
I wish you all the best
take care
xxx
You are doing really well Karen. :yesyes:
Dont give up. You are stronger than you think.
Love and hugs from shoegal xxx :flowers:
Well done Karen, you're doing well :yesyes: Keep up the good work :D
Good luck at the docs tomorrow :hugs: Please let us know how you get on.
Lisa x
Paddington
16-11-07, 10:04
mornin Karen hun:hugs: i have road tasted the spaghetti hun:yesyes: it does not cause wind and does not create the full up feeling that beans can sometimes give..you would ,i believe,be able to consume more spag than beans per serving..they are very tasty too:) I do hope all goes wekll at the drs today ..please let me know wont you hun:flowers: Love paddie.xxxxxxxxxxx
Thinking of you Karen hun:hugs: Hope all goes well for you at the docs.
Happyone
xx
Thinking of you today and hope you get on ok at docs :hugs:
Lisa x
bluesparkle
16-11-07, 12:12
hi karen...
still here reading and watching...
i think you are doing really well...
good luck today
sending you lots of :hugs: :hugs: :hugs:
rach
How did it go today?
Been thinking of you :hugs:
Lisa x
Thanks for the message of support :hugs:
My world almost ended today. In fact I am still in shock :ohmy: . This afternoon the door buzzer sounded and it was two 'doctors' and a social worker at my door. I panicked and couldn’t move.
I wasn't sure who they were when they came in but the social worker was from the CMHT and there were two men who said they were ‘doctors’, but they were both psychiatrists..
The only reason I didn’t flip out completely was because my doctor was there for part of the time but then she had to leave to start her surgery while they were still here.
Basically they had come to section me. The social worker said they had come to talk to me about going to the local hospital for refeeding. She asked me if I would be willing to go. I said I would rather stay at home. She kept asking me the same question and told me my weight is too low and I cannot manage at home so I need to be in hospital. I think she asked 3 or 4 times at various points.
Then the psychiatrists started asking me lots of questions about food and eating, why I’d lost weight, why I had lost the weight I gained at when I was at the eating disorder unit last year and how that showed I cannot keep my weight stable at home and so many other questions. I just kept telling them about what I’ve been doing this week and how much I am eating.
At one point the social worker went off to check the fridge to see whether there was any food in there and it was fortunate that it is full at the moment.
This is about the worst day of my life. When I didn’t voluntarily agree to go into hospital and after a lot of questions they went off to ‘talk’. They were discussing whether to section me I think.
Now I’ve been told by the social worker and psychiatrists that I have to gain weight and maintain it :weep: . I have to see my doctor weekly. And I have to see the social worker and CPN I saw last time again and allow them to see me at home when I don’t get on with either of them. I feel my life is being invaded enough without seeing people I don’t trust or want to talk to :weep: . It is a condition of staying out of hospital though that I see the local CMHT. I hate it.
If I lose weight or stop gaining then I’ll be sectioned and admitted to hospital :weep: . If I don’t keep my appointments with the CMHT or let them in here I’ll be sectioned :weep: . I also have to see that psychiatrist.
As soon as they had gone I had to go to my appointment with my doctor. She said basically this is it – either I eat and gain weight to a BMI of at least 16 or I will be sectioned :weep: . I don’t want to gain that much weight :weep: . I already feel like I am on a refeeding programme but that it is happening at home.
My life is invaded and I hate it. Life will never be the same again. I’ll get fat and they will make sure I stay fat and I have to see people I don’t want to see and have them in my life. This is awful :weep: .
My doctor said if I don’t it will be the local hospital on a ward for feeding with ‘old ladies’ as they CMHT or whoever are not willing to fund an EDU even so she said it will be even worse – and no internet access and on a ward. I have no choice :weep:
Karen xx
Karen, :hugs: :hugs:
I'm glad you are not in the hospital, that's a positive eh?:hugs:
I tend to agree with them in that now is the time to really start working as hard as you can if you want to stay out of hospital. I know you can do it hun.
A BMI of 16 is still very low, it would be much more healthy for you if you could manage it?
I'm also glad the MHT are getting involved hun, they are more experienced than your GP. If you feel uncomfortable with them, try to tell them and have a chat about it.
Thinking about you hun,
Jim:hugs:
You can do this Karen:shades:
We are all behind you:hugs:
Luv Kaz x x x:hugs:
Yes you can!!
You know maybe today your life did start to change. One way or another, you will build both your physical and mental strength up. It is a long haul, but I have total belief in you, Karen. I hope that this will eventually lead to a new you. :)
:hugs: :hugs:
Thank you for the support.
Jim - Thank you Jim :hugs: I am relieved I'm not in hospital. I can't believe what's happened this afternoon. I just want them to leave me alone.
I'm definitely not pleased about the involement of the CMHT. I don't want them involved.
Kaz - Thanks hun :hugs:
Piglet - Thank you for the hug and for thinking of me with everything you are going through :hugs:
Ray - Thanks for your reply :hugs: My life has just become more unbearable. I'm still facing bankruptcy if my debts cannot be sorted and now I have this added pressure from people I don't want to see.
I've had enough.
Karen xx
honeybee3939
16-11-07, 23:10
Karen:hugs: :hugs:
You should be so proud of yourself for what you achieved the last week with the food intake thats a real positive, you are doing so well hun. Its sounds to me like the Mental Health team etc realise you are trying too, so you keep at it hun.
Thinking of you:hugs: :hugs:
Andrea
xxxxx
:hugs: :hugs: :hugs: :hugs:
Sorry you had such a difficult day sis :hugs:
I'm glad you're not in hospital. I am to be honest glad you are getting some help now though. I know you don't want it but it has to be better than hospital for you?
I know you don't like these people but they do want to help you so maybe try and be open with them if you can and let them help you.
I know you want to be left alone but your doc can not let that happen as you are dangerously underweight now. I know gaining weight must seem awful to you but a BMI of 16 is still very underweight so no one is going to make you fat ok - you would have to be well over a BMI of 25 for that.
You are right in that life may not be the same now - I hope it will start to be better instead :flowers:
I really do feel for you but you can do this :yesyes:
We're all here for you :hugs:
Lots of love,
Lisa x
Hi Karen - theres not much I can add to the above.
About the only thing that is significant, is that if you are not happy with your CPN and others you can request a change. I'm not saying that the next one will be any better, however you can insist on a change and they have to agree to this.
Any letters back stating "this is the only one for the area" etc. are simply untrue. While you may not be happy challenging the system you'd be amazed how far a stern letter can help you at least change your predicament (and mostly for the better).
Krakers.
karen would it be allowed/wouldit help if I was there with yu when the CMHT people come to see you or do you want them to come here I can pick you up and take you back in between Millie being at school, would you like me to chat to them it would make it easier I am sure. More comfortable and I will put the heating on promise:hugs:
Also did you say that the last time you had the CPN and social worker that you never ever saw the social worker who was supposed to see you and the CPN was always off sick!!!!:blush:
That's a fab offer from Stargazer there hun - it must be a great support to have both Nigel and Stargazer there in person through the week. What a pair of smashing friends they are. :hugs:
I think you have tried really hard this week and should be very proud of yourself and the team must have thought so too otherwise you would have had to go into hospital - if you can work with them rather than against them then recovering at home rather than hospital is a bonus.
I'm so sorry I'm not really 'with it' at the mo hun - my head really is allover the place, perhaps once I've been to the funeral some normality to my day will return.
Big hugs and thinking of you.:hugs:
Love Piglet
I agree, what a lovely offer from Stargazer. You are lucky to have her and Nigel supporting you so much, real true friends :yesyes:
I hope you're ok today :hugs:
Thinking of you :flowers:
Lisa x
Keep up the good work Karen:yesyes:
Luv Kaz x x x:hugs:
Hi Karen, think of you often. x
Keep going Karen - you can do it
Linda xx
Lizzie1975
18-11-07, 11:45
:hugs: :hugs: :hugs:
Lizzie xx
http://i92.photobucket.com/albums/l23/dazzlejunction/greetings/inspirational/inspire_40.gif
Thinking Of You Karen.
Take Care Hun,http://i92.photobucket.com/albums/l23/dazzlejunction/greetings/hugs/hugs_7.gif
Love & Wishes,
Pip's X X X X
Hows today gone Karen?:flowers:
Been thinking of You:hugs:
Luv Kaz x x x:hugs:
Thank you for all the support :hugs:
I'm sorry for not posting yesterday but the shock of everything that happened on Friday suddenly hit me I think. I just felt unable to do anything.
Kracker - Thank you. I have been thinking of asking for a different social worker and CPN. I know there are other CPNs at the team and there must be other social workers. There is one other one I've seen but I didn't like her much and I don't like the one who came on Friday so that's a big problem. I don't know who I would get.
Stargazer - Thank you so much for your offer :hugs: I think if they come out to see me it will be to check I am eating and that I have food here so it would have to be here.
If I have to go there to see them it would help. They want to see Nigel too to make sure I am eating. They said it was important he tells them the truth and the truth is I am eating but I'm having rubbish food at the moment. It might be possible to see them at your home sometimes. I'm not sure. I cannot cope with cooking and making choices. I'm living on cereal, toast or yoghurts and fruit.
My weight is up slightly but I feel I'm eating junk or eating disorder unit food. I need some proper meals, especially some vegetables.
I did see the CPN a lot when first discharged from hospital but towards the end she was off sick a lot and I didn't want to see her anyway.
It kind of suits me to have a social worker who isn't very pro-active because I don't want to see her :blush:
Piglet - You are so kind thinking of me with all you are going through :hugs: I'm here if you need me or want to talk or text :hugs:
Lisa - Thanks sis :hugs: I'm not happy with the 'help' The psychiatrist is already talking about antidepressants. I just wish I could still afford to see my CBT therapist.
Pips, Sandlin, Alexis, Lizzie - Thank you :hugs:
Andrea - Thank you :hugs: I think it helped that there was food here when they checked and Nigel could confirm I have been eating and also that he had been here all week. It helped knowing I'm not alone I think.
Kaz - I am feeling really freaked out by what is happening :wacko: I'm keeping going with food but it is so difficult, particularly when I'm eating bad foods like cheese and fattening yoghurts just to push up my calorie intake :ohmy:
I'm worried either the social worker or CPN will ring or come here tomorrow.
Karen xx
Hi Karen,
Still thinking of you :hugs:
Well done for eating cheese and yoghurt, I know how hard that is for you for various reasons and I am so proud of you :hugs: Your body will appreciate the protein and calcium too.
I understand you wanting to see your CBT lady too :hugs: I wish I could see my old private CBT lady sometimes as she was so good but at £96 an hour I can't afford it anymore either so I do understand how you feel there.
Try not to worry about the week ahead and who may call or phone (I know it's easier said than done though :hugs: ). Just try and see it as they all want to help you through this as do we all here :flowers:
Take care,
Lisa x
Karen,
Thanks for the update - it really is fabulous that you have Nigel and Stargazer around - company is what you need to succeed I know.
Underneath the psychological problems, we all know you shine brightly and you have more inner strength than you realise. Wouldn't it be great if you could 'bite the bullet' and stick at the eating, just gradually building yourself up?
If you fancy some vegetables, why not have them as well? Perhaps as a reward for the other food you are eating too :)
Take Care
:hugs: :hugs:
:hugs:
Love Piglet :flowers:
honeybee3939
19-11-07, 16:25
Hi Karen
Just wanted to send you some positives vibes for this week hun.:hugs: :hugs:
Keep at it Karen, you are doing so well !:yesyes: :flowers:
Love
:hugs:
Andrea
xxxxx
Well done Karen, keep it up
:hugs:
How has today been?
Thinking of you :hugs:
Lisa x
Thank you for the support :hugs:
I've struggled today and retreated into old food patterns a bit. I cut back of what I see as 'bad' food - having less cereal for breakfast and more fruit. Lunch didn't really happen.
I had a tiny bit of a new potato done as a jacket potato for dinner with the intention of having a snack later but the snack didn't happen :blush:
I've asked Stargazer for help and she has kindly agreed to cook me some vegetable meals. Thanks hun :hugs: It is healthy and good for me and no one makes this vegetable mash like Stargazer :flowers:
Lisa - Thanks for your support sis :hugs:
The reasons you mentioned for me not eating the dairy products are still there. I think the op made it worse. I've got stomach pain too :weep: I don't want any more yoghurt now. It is worse than milk which I've stopped having now.
Ray - Thank you :hugs: I wish I could see what you do about me but I don't. I am bad. I don't have any inner strength anymore. I rely on others :blush:
Thank you Joe, Piglet, Andrea :hugs:
No calls as yet but I am scared the phone will ring.
Karen xx
Well done sis, you are trying so hard and I'm proud of you :hugs:
I am glad you have asked Stargazer for help, what a lovely friend she is :D
Sorry you are in pain and still having the problems :hugs:
Wish I could help more but I am thinking of you lots :flowers:
Lisa x
Lisa - Thank you sis :hugs:
I've arranged to see the dietician now. It was hard because I had to phone him and my social phobia is really bad again - so much so that I can barely talk. I trip over words and am almost stuttering :blush:
I am seeing him on Thursday.
Today has been another struggle. Breakfast was mostly fruit and no cereal again. The only difference being that I had one slice of Weight Watchers toast with all the crusts cut off for lunch.
I'm panicking because I know the dietician will tell me I need to eat more and I won’t be able to stick to a plan that pushes me too far with this.
My doctor has also told me that my thyroid levels are low too but wants to wait another month and do another blood test before deciding whether to increase my Thyroxine. That means I’ll gain weight even quicker. So I don’t need to eat as much as people think. I gain weight very easily as it is. I always have.
So now I’m in a real panic about it. I don’t want my weight to shoot up :weep: I’ll panic and restrict or stop eating again. I know he will expect me to have more than I’m comfortable with.
Karen xx
Am I right in thinking that hospital is no longer the threat it was?
You are doing so well hun with the eating and I know how hard it is for you:hugs:
Happyone
xxx
honeybee3939
20-11-07, 19:04
Hi Karen
Just want you to know i am thinking of you hun :hugs: :hugs:
Andrea
xxxxx
Dear Karen,
I've not been online for a few days so I've only just read about the visit from the psychiatrists etc. It sounds dreadful and I'm sorry you had to go through that. They must have seen that you are really trying though because they chose not to section you.
You are doing really well so please don't give up. I know it's really hard.
Thinking of you. :flowers:
Love and hugs from shoegal xxx
I'm so glad you are seeing a dietician, I hope that goes well :hugs: It might be hard to eat enough but just try your best.
Thinking of you :flowers:
Lisa x
I think the dietician is a real positive step despite your misgivings.
Please think of this as a way of avoiding hospital, but only if you do as he suggests, which you may see as pushing yourself.
But in return you will be able to stay at home with the internet! I know what you'd prefer!
Sending you positive vibes
:hugs:
Hi Karen - I've had a dig around on the internet and found a bit of info.
Your social worker (the new one) and your GP can't have you sectioned without another GP or relative agreeing.
If you can be cared for in the community, which is the first line treatment, then sectioning is a last resort.
You're seeing a dietician, which demonstrates you are able to make rational decisions. As I suggested previously, request a different social worker. Someone who has seen you once I don't believe is in a position to make such a judgment call.
Keep up your eating, weight doesn't matter at the mo, so long as you are showing willing and actually eating.
This is the most concise link I could find to the mental health act http://www.cambsmentalhealthinfo.nhs.uk/services/pboro/the_mental_health_act_-_sectio.html
Theres lots of others out there, and while its not your borough it spells it out in plain English.
Don't be afraid of the phone ringing, pick it up, and have a chat with what is most likely to be 99% a friend.
If you aren't a danger to yourself or others (which clearly you aren't because you're seeking community help), then its unlikely you'll be sectioned.
Keep seeking help and demonstrate you can do this yourself. I believe you can.
Krakers.
Just topping up the hugs :hugs: :hugs: :hugs:
Thinking of you :flowers:
Lisa x
honeybee3939
21-11-07, 13:39
:hugs: :hugs: :hugs:
Andrea
xxxxxx
Still thinking of you Karen. :hugs:
Let us know how you are getting on.
Love and hugs from shoegal xxx
Thank you all for your messages of support.
Shoegal - Thank you :hugs: I am ok just have been struggling trying to keep earing enough. My intake has been down a bit in the past couple of days but I'm still trying to eat.
Yes it was very scary. I thought nothing would happen before that as it had taken them all week but Friday afternoon they turned up.
Krackers - Thank you so much for finding all that informatuin for me :hugs:
When they came here to assess me there was a social worker, a psychitrist and and another GP from my doctor's surgery. My doctor came too for part of the time. She is good like that because she knew I'd panic.
My doctor doesn't believe I can do it. I can't believe they came to my home. They were almost telling me to go to hospital myself. I believe they were intent on sectioning me when they arrived.
Lisa - Thanks sis :hugs: I am worried about seeing the dietician tomorrow. If I tell him what I'm rating he might tell the CMHT and the whole sectioning thing will happen again.
Andrea - Thanks so much for your support :hugs: It means a lot to me.
Happyone - :hugs: Hospital is still a constant threat.
A big thank you and hugs to Stargazer for making some vegetable meals for me :hugs:
Ray - Thank you :hugs: You are right that I want to be at home with the internet. My doctor has already said there is no internet access at the local hospital which is where they would send me.
I feel worse due to all this threat of hospital. I'm obsessing about food and calories more and more :wacko:
Karen xx
Dear Karen,
I really do feel for you hun. The threat of hospital must be sending your anxiety sky high and making your eating problems worse. You are doing your best and that is all that you can do. I know it's hard but you really must try to eat as much as you can. I know that thought is awful for you, but the alternative is eating more in hospital and that would be much more stressful for you. Please try some of the things people have suggested, like fruit smoothies, or build up drinks, or maybe a light meal like an omalette or something... ANYTHING to get nutrients into your body hun. Take each day as it comes and try not to think ahead too much. Just concentrate on each meal and reward yourself for your achievements. Please be honest with the dietician when you see her because she has your best interests at heart.
Thinking of you Karen. I know this is so hard hun. :flowers:
Love and hugs from shoegal xxx
Hi Karen - while stressful, can I take it that hey came to your home, had a chat and then left, with you still at home ?
From everything I've read so long as you are showing willingness and attempting to make an effort, then they will not section you.
Keep it up hun, try and eat and even if you can't, drink the milk shakes others have recomended. Weight isn't as important right now as you proving you can and will beat this - yourself.
BTW - it may be worth keeping a diary for your own benefit, and if they turn up again of what you've eaten. While they may say you've lost a pound, if you can show them a regular pattern to your eating behaviour then thats big brownie points.
Krakers.
:hugs: For You Karen:hugs:
Linda xxx
Hi Karen,
Good luck with the dietician :hugs: Please be honest with him, it's the only way he can really help you properly. If he does not know exactly what you currently manage he can't help you as well. I'm sure he won't feed back to the MHT and get you sectioned for being honest. He isn't linked to them anyway is he? Just try and do what he suggests and see how you get on.
Even tell him how much you eat now and tell him you need to build up to more gradually if needs be if that would make you feel better about it. I'm sure he will have some suggestions.
Thinking of you :hugs:
Lisa x
Thanks all :hugs:
Linda :hugs:
Piglet - Thanks for the hug :hugs:
Shoegirl - Thank you :hugs: Yes it is very hard. I am still eating regularly but my calorie intake has been down a bit for a couple of days. I am still trying to eat and that's all I can do. I often make meals which go wrong and then I cannot eat them. It is a struggle but I don't want to go into hospital.
Krackers - Yes they left me at home but with the threat that if I don't show signs of 'progress' and weight gain then I'll be put in the local hospital - on a medical ward just for refeeding. I am making huge efforts to eat a little and I'm doing what they want by seeing a dietician and seeing my doctor regularly. I just don't want to see the CMHT. Thank you for your support :hugs:
Lisa - Thanks sis :hugs:
I was honest with the dietician and gave him copies of my food diary so he has all the information now to help me. He was only here for about 15 minutes at the most.
He said he had been talking with my and they both think weight gain of half a kilo a week is reasonable :ohmy: He said he and my doctor would like me to be a bit safer and also out of the danger zone for sectioning and for me to maintain there for a while. He has taken my food diary and wants to go away and work out some sort of food plan or suggestions for me.
He was ok and I felt he did listen to what I was saying but I don't know how I'll cope with this weight gain. I feel dreadful about it.
Karen xxx
Karen,
I understand your terror at gaining weight, but isn't there a tiny part of you that knows this is what your body needs? The average size for a woman in the UK is a 14 and it's actually not that big. Even if you put on half a kilo a week for a little while you will be nowhere near the size of the average UK woman. I know you will find it hard to believe but there is nothing unattractive about being a bit bigger. I know that this idea will disgust you but is there any way you can challenge those thoughts? You are not going to suddenly be obese, you will just steadily fill out a little bit which is much healthier for your body. I am naturally very skinny and find it incredibly hard to put on weight, but when I recently put on a stone (I think it must be my age) everyone said how well I looked. It was certainly not a negative thing at all.
I know you are trying your best and I know putting on weight is your worst nightmare. But you know, in time you might actually come to love your new body because you will feel stronger, healthier and more vibrant, and wouldn't that be fantastic?
Thinking of you Karen. :flowers:
Love and hugs from shoegal xxx
Hi Karen,
Glad the dietician appt went ok :hugs: You know I do understand how gaining weight must terrify you so much, but on the other hand you have to find some way to accept you need/have to gain weight, especially if you want to stay out of hospital. Also for the sake of your health. So many of your problems would actually be alot better if you were properly nourished maybe.
Try and think of it like this - you are not being asked to gain alot of weight, you are being asked to gain a bit to get you out of the danger zone and eventually get your BMI up to 16 if I am right? A BMI of 16 would mean you were still VERY underweight anyway so it's not like you are being asked to have a BMI of even a normal weight right now.
If you still weigh what you told me a couple of weeks ago (and you can't be that different in 2 weeks) you would need to gain something like 3 stone to even be at the lower end of normal for your height, so you have a long long way to go before you are even a normal weight let alone fat or even overweight.
I know your issues have nothing to do with what you look like though but being so small has not brought you the happiness you thought it would has it? Being even smaller will only bring worse health and hospital and you don't want that do you.
You can do this sis, step by step. I am not syaing it will be easy but you can do it :hugs:
I do wish they would give you some proper psychological help ie CBT etc to deal with the issues of why you have this in the first place though as that would really help.
Lots of love,
Lisa x
Thanks Shoegirl and Lisa :hugs:
I don't really want to gain weight and that's the problem. This is all getting way out of control. I am scared of starting bingeing again as this is causing me to obsess about food and weight constantly.
When I saw my today she was pleased I had seen the dietician and also that I’ve been eating enough to stabilise my weight. She asked whether I’ve heard from the CMHT and thankfully I haven’t yet.
But she said I need to gain weight gain by next week or I'll have the CMHT on my back again. They are in touch with her and still monitoring me :weep:
This is so hard. I don’t want to gain at all :weep:
I also dropped my mobile phone in a bowl of water. Now it doesn’t work. I need a mobile phone :weep:
Karen xx
:hugs: Karen
Luv Kaz x x x:hugs:
Karen - Shoegal and Lisa have spoken a lot of sense in their posts. If only we could flick a switch to overcome this hurdle!
Life is full of hurdles that are necessary for us to progress. How many of us wanted to go to the dentist, but it was necessary to keep our teeth healthy and save us from increased pain, especially in the long term. There are other examples I could quote where we couldn't develop without pain.
I find this difficult to write as I cannot experience your actual feelings, and can just hazard a guess.
I feel that once you can get out of the danger zone and then become less concerned about your weight, you can tackle some of the other issues that will bring out both the inner and outer beauty you surely have.
:hugs:
Thinking of you Karen and wish I knew how to help you more with this :hugs:
I know it's hard eating but somehow you have to accept you have to gain a bit of weight, I don't know how you accept it though and I know it won't be easy. Remember that you are making your body healthy though and keeping yourself out of hospital if you keep eating and gain a bit.
Lots of love,
Lisa x
Some Saturday hugs :hugs: :hugs: :hugs:
Lisa x
honeybee3939
24-11-07, 15:48
Hi Karen
Well done hun for managing to eat enough to stablise you weight:hugs: I know it must be so hard for you also, but im sure its better than having to go in hospital.:hugs:
Hope you managed to get your mobile sorted, i dropped mine in my fish pond a few weeks ago and it wouldnt work, i took the back off and removed the battery part and left it to dry out for a day or so and it started working again.
Keep strong hun.:hugs:
Andrea
xxxxx
Today is awful. Things have been getting bad since last night. I have been subject to someone's bad mood and frustration.
I cannot cope with this extra stress :weep: :weep: :weep:
My mobile phone still doesn't work so I feel cut off too :weep: :weep:
I cannot cope.
Karen xx
Just stopping by to give you a big hug
:hugs: :hugs: :hugs: :hugs: :hugs: :hugs:
Doo you have an airing cupboard? If so might be worth putting your mobile and battery in there.
Awww sis :hugs:
You can cope and you will get through this :hugs: Must be hard without your phone too. I pretty much never use mine yet I'd hate to travel anywhere without it. I hope you can dry it out and that it then works.
Sorry to hear things are tense with Nigel. I'm sure he doesn't mean to take anything out on you, he obviously cares about you a lot or he would not be doing all he is to help you. It's natural he would get frustrated sometimes, he probably feels upset that he doesn't know how to help you or something like that maybe? Try not to take it too personally, often people yell at those closest to them or who they live with, it's not always meant. Maybe when he feels calmer you can both have a chat and clear the air. I'm not taking sides honest, I know you are going through hell, but sometimes it's also hard for those around us too. I do feel for you as I hate rowing with anyone too and hate people ranting at me. Big hugs sis :hugs:
Thinking of you and hope tomorrow or even this evening has been better for you :flowers:
Lisa x
Hope you get some decent sleep and have a better day tomorrow.
:hugs:
Just letting you know I'm thinking of you Karen.
:hugs: :hugs: :hugs: :hugs: :hugs: :hugs:
Love and hugs from shoegal xxx
Hope today is better for you :hugs:
Lisa x
Thank you all :hugs:
Lisa - Thanks sis :hugs: We did make up but he is in a foul mood again :weep: This isn't really about me. It's his frustration about his things. It just seems like I'm suffering because of it right now.
Thank you for the kind wishes Shoegirl, Piglet, Ray :hugs:
Jo - Thanks for the suggestion about my phone :hugs: . I've tried putting somewhere warm to dry out but it is still not working. I think I need a new phone.
Well done for recent progress hun.:hugs:
I don't like to comment on Nigel's mood (so Piglet goes ahead anyway:blush: ) but love it must be quite hard for him to balance all the time he spends with you and the other comittments we all have to attend to, which is bound to lead to some stress at some point.
Why not have a chat and see where perhaps you may be able to help him this time!?:yesyes:
Love Piglet :flowers:
Thanks Piglet :hugs:
I do try but I don't know how. I think I should stop discussing this here anyway. We are trying today but I foresee problems tonight.
On top of all the food and hospital worries I've now started sleepwalking again :weep: With that comes the problem of sleep eating and just reinforces to me that I cannot keep food here overnight.
For the past week I've had suspions that I'm sleepwalking. Saturday night I definitely did as I woke on Sunday to a state of devastation at things being moved around and signs I'd definitely been up.
Last night again I'm sure I was sleepwalking. I woke up not feeling too good with a headache and just feeling sore. I now have a bruise above my left eye and I've no idea how it got there :ohmy:
Today I've found it difficult to eat and there isn't much food here. I'm starting to give up :weep:
Karen xx
karen
i dont think we have talked befor i do read this post to see how you are doing every day
please dont give up hun you have to keep trying
:hugs: :hugs: :hugs: :hugs: :hugs: :hugs: :hugs: :hugs: :hugs: :hugs:
jodie xxx
Hi Karen :hugs:
Don't give up sis :hugs: I know it's hard but you can do this. When is the dietician getting back to you with a plan?
I wish I knew what to say to help more but I think of you lots :hugs:
Lisa x
Dying_Swan
26-11-07, 23:22
Hi Karen.
I know we don't know each other but I've been reading your post too. I really wish I could offer you some words of wisdom but not sure that I can.
It seems like you are making a really big effort to eat and well done for that.
Have some :hugs::hugs::hugs::hugs:
Keep your chin up xxx :flowers:
honeybee3939
26-11-07, 23:26
:hugs: :hugs: :hugs: :hugs:
Love
:hugs:
Andrea
xxxxx
Jodie - Thank you for your support and encouragement :hugs: I am always amazed that so many people care about me. Thank you.
Lisa - Thanks sis :hugs: What you say does help but I've become lost again these past few days. I think the situation I'm in now doesn't help. The stress of the past few days is getting to me and I'm withdrawing again :sad:
Dying Swan - Thank you and welcome :hugs: Every post of support I receive does help. It helps seeing that other people care.
Andrea - Thanks for the hugs :hugs:
I have eaten today but it has been a day of rubbish foods. Every night I end up eating yoghurt just to get my calorie intake up and I'm fed up with eating it :weep: I feel very fat now :weep:
Now it is nearly bed time and I know there will be problems here :weep:
Karen xx
Hi Karen,
I just wanted to say I'm still thinking of you. Please don't give up hun. You have been doing so well and each day is a new day so try to stay positive.
I'm sending you lots of squeezy hugs. :hugs: :hugs: :hugs: :hugs: :hugs:
Love and hugs from shoegal xxx
:hugs:
Love Piglet :flowers:
Hey Karen,:hugs:
Keep it up hun.:hugs:
I'm not sure if it helps but I think you should try to find the reasons why you should keep going. That will help you decide deep down that you want to get better.
For my self harm one of the techniques I learnt is to write down a list of pros and cons for my negative behaviours. You will always find that there are so many more reasons not to do them. Then when you feel like giving in, you can look at your list and see the reasons why you are trying so hard.
When I was harming at the beginning I thought it was helping, it made me feel better when I was feeling emotional and gave me control where I had none. However, when I was made to think about it, I was getting worse in the long term, it made me feel ashamed, guilty, different, hurting / worrying other people around me, causing my body permanent damage, that I was a weirdo or a 'bad person' for doing it and many more reasons.
So it helped me come to the conclusion that I want to get well. I sometimes feel from what you say that you don't yet feel like you want to get better?
Jim:hugs:
honeybee3939
27-11-07, 13:54
Hi Karen
Just wanted to send you some hugs for today hun:hugs: :hugs: :hugs:
Love
:hugs:
Andrea
xxxxxx
I hope you had a better night and are having a better day today too :hugs:
Lisa x
:hugs: Karen
Luv Kaz x x x
How's it going Karen?
:hugs:
Lisa x
Where are you up to with things hun??? :hugs:
Piglet :flowers:
Hi Karen,
I'm still thinking of you. How are you doing?
Love and hugs from shoegal xxx
Thank you for all the messages of support :hugs:
Jim - Yes I get what you are saying about self harm. I've done that in the past and I guess the eating disorder took over my need to do that. Part of it is that it's my only coping strategy. I think anorexia is now part of who I am - I am so trapped and lost in it that take away the anorexia and there is nothing left. I am nothing. The 'Karen' that used to exist is no longer here anymore and never will be.
It's been a really tough couple of days here and I'm struggling with food obsession. It is so difficult eating just because I'm being forced to and that's without even considering my despair at being told to gain weight when I don't want to do that either.
I find it soo hard knowing I have to eat or I'll be sent to hospital and the stress of what's happening is getting to me so much. I'm doing things in my sleep again :weep:
Deep down I still don't want to eat and although I am eating I am still making bad food choices and trying to restrict again. The foods I am eating are 'bad' to me and I don't choose healthy meals.
By evening yesterday I'd barely had anything that would give me the kind of calories I'm supposed to need. In the end I had Weight Watchers crisps for dinner. I seem to eat yoghurt every day just to get my calorie intake up.
Today I had just under half a teacake for lunch :ohmy: and to me that is really bad :weep:
Dinner isn't going to be anything healthy either as I don't have anything here and couldn't cook or eat it anyway.
I don't want to be in hospital where I'll have no choice and no one understands about anorexia. I want to do it at home but in a way if I wish I had a small (almost baby sized for my stomach right now) healthy meal of something I like given to me to eat. It's like it is impossible for me to give myself permission :wacko:
Hugs to you all :hugs:
Shoegirl
Piglet
Lisa
Andrea
Kazzie
I don't know why you bother with me anymore :blush: I'm a rubbish friend :blush:
Karen xx
YOU ARE NOT A RUBBISH FRIEND!!!:lac: :lac: :lac:
You are a very lovely, sweet, kind friend who happens to need support at the moment:flowers: :bighug1: :bighug1: :bighug1:
Luv Kaz x x x:hugs:
Karen, :hugs:
I am so trapped and lost in it that take away the anorexia and there is nothing left. I am nothing. The 'Karen' that used to exist is no longer here anymore and never will be.
Hun, that's not true, you are a wonderful caring person and although things might have changed, we all change over time. There's no reason why things can't change again. That is the amazing thing about us humans we have the ability to change. No-one ever stays the same.
Maybe you could think of some goals that you would like to be able to do, perhaps a hobby or something that you have enjoyed doing in the past? That would give you something to work towards.
I just invested in a juicer from Lloyds Pharmacy for only a tenner, I'm loving it as I don't like eating loads of fruit but in juice I can get all the vitamins and goodness without eating piles of fruit.
I can't imagine how hard it must be for you to eat when you don't want to. But you are trying and that is a big step.:yesyes: So you deserve a really big hug from me for that.
:bighug1:
Has the dietitian come up with a menu for you that you could try to use? Then you can have something that you can try to work towards and be sure that the food is healthy and not 'bad'.
I don't know why you bother with me anymore :blush: I'm a rubbish friend :blush:
Hun, you make me all teary saying things like that. You are a fantastic person hun. You don't deserve to be going through this.:hugs:
Jim:hugs:
Hi Karen,
I'm sorry to hear that you are not feeling so good. It made me sad to hear you say:
I am nothing. The 'Karen' that used to exist is no longer here
Hun, that simply is NOT true. Karen is still in there, she is just a little bit lost right now, but she's definately in there.
I know you are really struggling with the food Karen, but eating anything is good right now. Please try to take each day as it comes so you don't feel so overwhelmed.
I wish I lived near you. I could make you something nice that you sort of fancied and I wouldn't mind if you hardly touched it. At least you would be able to try without the added stress of cooking and preparing meals.
Try to stay strong hun. Hang in there.
Thinking of you. :flowers:
Love and hugs from shoegal xxx
honeybee3939
28-11-07, 19:55
Aww Karen:hugs: :hugs: :hugs:
Be strong hun, i know its hard for you but please keep trying hun.
I don't know why you bother with me anymore :blush: I'm a rubbish friend :blush:
Karen now dont you be saying silly things like that, i feel very privilaged to have you as friend:hugs: :hugs: :hugs:
Love and hugs
:hugs: :hugs:
Andrea
xxxxxx
Hey hun
you are a lovely person with so much to give and everyone but you sees it sunshine. You are not a rubbish friend. People wouldn't keep coming here if thet thought that, ok:hugs:
Happyone
xxx
I think anorexia is now part of who I am - I am so trapped and lost in it that take away the anorexia and there is nothing left. I am nothing. The 'Karen' that used to exist is no longer here anymore and never will be.
That's not true Karen :hugs: You are still you no matter what illness you have and are a very special person just as you are. You are way more than your anorexia :hugs:
I don't know why you bother with me anymore :blush: I'm a rubbish friend :blush:
Karen xx
This is not true either :lac: Look how many people care about you, why would we all bother if that were true. You are a special person that still cares for others even when you are struggling :hugs:
I am sorry you are feeling so low right now and finding it all so hard :hugs: Don't give up though as you can do this.
To be honest anything you eat is better than not eating at all so just try and keep eating. Hopefully the dieticans plan will help too.
Thinking of you lots :flowers:
Lisa x
Paddington
29-11-07, 11:23
hello sweet girl:hugs: sooo sorry i have not been on here much ..but as you know..me poorly..again:mad: Any hoo.YOU ARE NOT A RUBBISH FRIEND AT ALL!You are a friend in need of support and understanding ..and we are ALL here for you Karen:flowers: Right,healthy small lunch suggestion..microwave a fish finger and have it on w.w.bread..again no cooking required..or instant mash with some flaked fish mixed in..or a little cheese..so easy and tasty hun.I would say a poached egg but i dont think you have a pan do you..you couls ,in fact,whip egg into the mash hun..?Fed upwith yoghurt..try skinney cow ice cream bars!!!!97 cals approx!I think if you can take the guilt away from certain foods,it can help psychologically.I mean you would not expect a choc chip ice cream bar to be so low in calories would you..so it allows one to eat without so much guilt..you KNOW i KNOW where you are coming from:huh: Dont 4get the small tins of w.w.spaghetti hun :) I think if you included these things the dietician would be very pleased:flowers: If i cant get on here i will keep up on face book when i can..thank you for all the gifts and cards my friend...BAD FRIEND ..MY ARCE!!:ohmy: Love Paddie.xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Thinking of you :hugs:
Lisa x
Probably a stupid suggestion but what about some jars of baby food that you only have to pop into the microwave - things like stewed apples that you could then have hot with your yoghurt.
Lovie you are sooooooo much more than anorexia - keep plugging away my friend.:hugs: (((((Karen))))) golden cloak hug!!!
Love Piglet :flowers:
Brill idea Piglet:yesyes: :yesyes: :yesyes:
:hugs: :hugs: :hugs: Karen
Luv Kaz x x x
It must be so hard for you, Karen. You know you must eat, or face having your freedom taken away. That's a tough call.
Anorexia is nothing at all to do with eating more and you will be fine. It just isn't that cut and dried. The issue isn't even food, it's control, anxiety, low self esteem, in fact a million and one reasons.
As has been the case since your eating disorder began, until such time as your emotional self can be healed then you unfortunately will never be able to overcome the anorexia. You will keep eating what you need to until the present crisis of being shoved into hospital and refed passes, but the fact will still remain that your problems have not been addressed at all.
I don't know what the answer is, Karen, but I know that you will not be able to conquer this alone.
My heart goes out to you, I really wish there was something that we could do to help. I also don't know who would be the best people to be helping you in a professional capacity. Threatening you with being sectioned or admitted to an eating disorder unit whereby they will merely get your weight up and then discharge you is obviously madness, but I don't know what the alternatives are.
Thinking of you, Karen, even though I'm afraid that I can't give you any support that will help you :weep:
Love Kate xx
Thank you to everyone who has replied. So many helpful suggestions and comments. I really appreciate all the support :hugs:
Jim - I don't really have any hobbies and I don't think I ever have. I cannot even get a break from thinking about food or eating or hospital or thoughts related to the anorexia now either. My social phobia is really bad right now and I've withdrawn into myself so much I just don't have the strength to do anything else :wacko: My problems take up my whole day.
Shoegal - That's so kind of you :hugs: Thank you so much. I too wish I live closer. I am lucky to have a couple of friends I see but only one lives close to me. I do need help with meals and preparing food. As hard as I try I just end up living on junk but when I try to look for other food and healthy meals I cannot do it alone :wacko:
Andrea - Thank you :hugs: and thank you for your continued support.
Happyone - Thanks hun :hugs: I just find it hard to understand why people care about me.
Lisa - Thanks sis :hugs: The dietician basically said to eat anything but I don't want it all to be high sugar or high fat. It's like being re-fed except worse now because I am doing it to myself because I am so panicked about hospital.
Paddie - :hugs: You are a great support to me. I haven't been able to text you due to my mobile not working. I hope you feel better soon and they find out the cause :hugs: I'll message you on Facebook.
Thanks for the food suggestions. I know you understand how I feel. I don't have a pan and no one makes poached egg like you my ss :hugs: Can you microwave fish fingers? I've tried microwaving cod loin and it either explodes or I'm never sure if it is cooked.
My local supermarket didn't have the WW spaghetti. Does it have lots of herbs in it? I looked on the website and I'm not sure about the herbs. I haven't looked at the instant mash yet. I've tried eating one baby new potato as a baked potato but it is too heavy. So many suggestions but I find it hard to make a decision :wacko:
Piglet - Thanks hun :hugs: How are you? It's not stupid and I must admit I thought about baby food myself once but it never looks very appetising. The dessert ones look better but none of them seem to same how many calories are in each one and I'd need to know that first.
Kazzie - Thanks hun :hugs:
Kate - Thank you so much :hugs: Yes, it is very hard and I feel like I am trapped. If I don't eat I feel better but I risk having my freedom taken away but eating is the worst thing in the world to me and I feel I've got no choice. I have been told to eat when it is against my wishes. I feel panicked and I hate myself so much for every bite of food I have. At times I sit here and I cannot eat.
Anorexia is not really about food. It is in the fact that I don't eat but the reasons behind it are so complicated. It is all the things you mention and a lot more.
As has been the case since your eating disorder began, until such time as your emotional self can be healed then you unfortunately will never be able to overcome the anorexia. You will keep eating what you need to until the present crisis of being shoved into hospital and refed passes, but the fact will still remain that your problems have not been addressed at all.
Yes, I fear this is the case too. Eating won't help me get well. It will move me physically from danger a bit but it won't help the anorexia or any of my other problems.
I don't think I can overcome the anorexia alone either and this current threat of hospital isn't doing anything to help me. I'm just more panicked and won't be able to keep up eating like this.
My heart goes out to you, I really wish there was something that we could do to help. I also don't know who would be the best people to be helping you in a professional capacity. Threatening you with being sectioned or admitted to an eating disorder unit whereby they will merely get your weight up and then discharge you is obviously madness, but I don't know what the alternatives are.
It isn't even an eating disorder unit. They would admit me to a medical ward with all the 'old ladies' my doctor said. I would be on a hospital ward just to be forced to eat and gain weight. Then I'd come out and set about losing it all again.
I've been referred to go on a waiting list to for an assessment for therapy of some sort but I have trust issues with the people at the CMHT and the psychologist. It won't help and will take months to organise.
I saw the dietician today but I still don't know what to eat or have a food plan exactly. He had my food diaries from last time and just said to add in a fourth meal as a snack but my days don't run like that and there isn't time before bed for another meal.
He also said I need some protein which is a problem when I don't eat meat. I used to but the idea of eating it now turns my stomach. He said to try having baked beans with my potato but I'm scared beans with hurt my already sore and bloated stomach :ohmy: I couldn't physically eat that much.
I thought I was going to get help with eating healthy foods but although he acknowledges my fears about my weight jumping up he is also content for me to get calories by eating anything and not whether I'm having a healthier diet. Living on cereal, yoghurt and crisps is not healthy.
So I still don't know what to do :shrug:
Once again thank you for the support from you all :hugs:
Karen xx
honeybee3939
29-11-07, 19:13
:hugs: :hugs: :hugs:
Love
:hugs:
Andrea
xxxxxx
How about I make you a nice fish pie with mashed parsnip instead of potato or mashed carrot something that is not so starchy how does that sound, you will get the protein from the fish and cheese and milk and vit c from the carrot let me know, will probably use plaice that is a nice light fish the girls love it xxxxxxx
Hi Karen :hugs: :hugs: :hugs:
I wish I knew how to help you too :hugs:
Has the dietician given you an actual plan to follow? I was hoping he would work out a proper written plan, has he? Something along the lines of calories per day to roughly aim for, a gradual increase in them week by week to let your body adjust along with meal ideas for each meal of the day. Has he done any of this?
It would be good if he could maybe. You could start by listing what you will actually eat or what you are willing to attempt and take it from there, then maybe he can work around that for now? Just a thought. Just thought it would be alot easier for you to just try and stick to a plan ie look at the list, pick something to have it and try and have it. I know it's not as easy as that but if he writes down some meal ideas at least you would have something to aim for and it might make deciding what to eat a bit easier.
I do know it is hard to eat but somehow you have to and you have to somehow eat more too. It might be uncomfortable on your poor tummy at first but it will pass as you get used to it. Maybe your doc has some suggestions there on how to help with the bloating etc.
Many things can be done in a microwave but in all honesty it would help you alot to have a few pans/dishes etc. It would give you alot more scope for meals anyway.
I agree a healthy diet is important, but I also agree with your dietician that in your case eating anything is better than eating nothing as you so desperately need food and to gain some weight.
I thought the baby food idea was great actually - I just had a look online and some jars of baby food are only 100 calories ish for a whole jar. Might be worth trying if you get stuck.
I am glad you have been referred for therapy and I hope you do not have to wait too long. If it was me I would make you an urgent case and make sure they helped you asap, it makes me mad people who desperately need help now have to wait so long :mad: When will they learn that to help anorexics they need to adress the root cause/s not just feed people up :lac:
Regarding the therapy though - saying you know it won't help is not ideal sis is it. How do you know it won't help?, it won't if you decide it won't before even giving it a chance. I am not meaning to be harsh here as I truly know you do not like these people and I DO understand that :hugs: BUT any therapy is help and is good and may even help you if you give it a fair chance :hugs: You do not have to like the person, obviously it helps, but they are there to help you so let them if you can? I'm sure there must be more than one perosn anyway so you could ask for someone else maybe? I would just hate to see you turn help down when your options are already a bit limited right now and you need all the help you can get.
I hope you know I make these suggestions as I care about you so much :hugs: I always worry I have said too much or will upset you but you know that is never my intention - I just want to help you get well and if that means being honest to try and help I will be.
If you have docs tomorrow I hope it goes well :hugs:
Thinking of you :flowers:
Lisa x
For something sweet for a change I could make you some little fatless sponge cakes, same as cakes but without the fat, they would be something to nibble on just for a change, home made and without all the procesed stuff:hugs: :hugs: :hugs:
How about I make you a nice fish pie with mashed parsnip instead of potato or mashed carrot something that is not so starchy how does that sound, you will get the protein from the fish and cheese and milk and vit c from the carrot let me know, will probably use plaice that is a nice light fish the girls love it xxxxxxx
Stargazer Karen and the Cherubs turn round to find Piglet sat at the table too with a napkin tucked under her chin and her knife and fork at the ready!!!
Seriously guys if I was any closer then this would be happening - sounds yummy!!!
Karen hun I hope you get on ok at the doctors today. :hugs:
Love Piglet :flowers:
Karen,
good luck with this treatment which could be the start of your journey to good health.
everyone here is behind you.
:hugs: :hugs:
Happyone
xxx
Dying_Swan
30-11-07, 18:52
Hi Karen.
I hope you're having a good day today :)
I thought of you at work (when I was gobbling away) and just thought I'd throw in a suggestion:
How about crudites and dips? You can buy carrot batons and celery sticks (so no preparation), and maybe some cubes/slices of cheese? Dipped into Humous - would give you some protein from the chickpeas in the humous, and it's not fattening.
I used to eat the fruit babyfood jars - if you check the ingredients, you can buy some which are just pureed fruit and they're really yummy.
Heinz tinned spaghetti is now made from wholewheat pasta and it tastes just as good - and has no herbs.
Sending you some :hugs::hugs::hugs:
xxx :flowers:
Thanks for letting me know you got on okayish at the doctors today mate. I know like me you're having probs getting on the site today as are a few of us it seems.
I do think the quorn is a good idea and like I said have a little look on the quorn site before you go shopping then you'll know what you want to buy.
Well done for keep trying mate. :yesyes:
Love Piglet :flowers:
Hi Karen,
Still thinking of you :hugs: Thanks for the message earlier :hugs:
Lisa x
Morning Karen, :hugs: :hugs:
How are you managing at the moment? Is there anything we can do to help you more?
I feel your despair at the moment and I wish there was more I could do to help.:hugs:
Have any of the recipes been of help? There are a lot of healthy foods you can get in packets at the supermarket. Have a look in the health foods section with the edible dried fruits, you can get fruit bars which I love at the moment. Also nuts and seeds are a good source of protein, I forget which ones have the lowest fat but I think almonds are really good.
Jim:hugs:
Hi All
I'm sorry if it seems I have gone quiet again but I've had the same problems others have had getting on the forum for the past 2 days so I couldn't post.
There are so many helpful suggestions and so much support. Thank you all so much :hugs:
I'll be here forever replying to you all individually so I'll just say thank you and how it means so much to me :hugs:
I'm managing to eat a little still but to me it is all the wrong food and far too much. I find myself obsessing too much about it and I end up having meals that are fattening and unhealthy still :wacko:
I dread going shopping because it is hard going out and even harder choosing and buying food. I end up coming home with the same food every time because blind panic hits me as soon as I get there. I try to remember suggestions that have been made but when I get to the supermarket I just can't think. Nigel is usually doing his shopping at the same time and before I know it we've been there 2 hours and I'm just in sheer panic :ohmy:
Lisa - Thanks sis :hugs: I've messaged you so you know I am not all all upset with you. I know you care.
Has the dietician given you an actual plan to follow? I was hoping he would work out a proper written plan, has he? Something along the lines of calories per day to roughly aim for, a gradual increase in them week by week to let your body adjust along with meal ideas for each meal of the day. Has he done any of this?
No he hasn't. He's looked at my food diaries and said to continue with what I've been doing but to add some protein and that's when he suggested baked beans or Quorn, as I don't eat meat now. I haven't for months.
The trouble is that my current diet isn't healthy and that's what I need help with. I keep eating the same foods and I'm having too much sugar and fat.
Just thought it would be alot easier for you to just try and stick to a plan ie look at the list, pick something to have it and try and have it. I know it's not as easy as that but if he writes down some meal ideas at least you would have something to aim for and it might make deciding what to eat a bit easier.
Yes that would maybe make it a bit easier. At the moment I'm just in blind panic.
I have too much food here but at the same time I have nothing hardly at all. I have one cereal, some brown danish diet bread, grapes, Weight W crisp hula hoops and a tin of spahetti hoops that I am too scared to try and don't think I'll like. I also have 4 yoghurts that are fattening but I seem to live on them now just to maintain my calorie intake. It is all so wrong and devastating.
Stargazer - Thanks hun :hugs: I've sent you a message. I like the sound of the vegetables and occasionally I eat fish. The problem for me would be the sauce. I don't really like white sauces. I don't want to put you to a lot of trouble and find I can't eat it. I usually have fish dry and grill it to dry it more. I don't know maybe it is just me :wacko:
Piglet - Thank you :hugs: And thanks for your message too :flowers: I tried to look online at the baby food - and I feel such shame really that I am reduced to this. Most of it seemed to be over 200 calories or it was really mushed up and looked horrible. The savoury ones do anyway! So I don't know.
Jim - I am still trying but my panic is growing too. I feeling despair as I feel all of my control being taken away from me and at the same time I feel blinded by panic.
The suggestions are helpful but here, trapped in my anorexia and with the reality of how my day works and what my life is like I just cannot do it. My life isn't normal and neither is my routine.
I hate to admit that I do need help :blush: :weep: But not in hospital and not from mental health workers. I just don't know how to live properly anymore.
Dying Swan - Thanks for the suugestions and for thinking of me :hugs: Humous isn't something I've ever tried. I looked at it once and just thought I wouldn't like it :wacko: I'm like that with a lot of food. I've always been a fussy eater :blush:
Paddie - I am so sorry you are not well right now. Some hugs for you :hugs: How are you feeling now? I haven't had instant mash in years! Thanks for all your help and suggestions :hugs:
This is getting too long :blush: Thank you for all the support. It really does help :hugs:
Karen xx
I dread going shopping because it is hard going out and even harder choosing and buying food. I end up coming home with the same food every time because blind panic hits me as soon as I get there. I try to remember suggestions that have been made but when I get to the supermarket I just can't think. Nigel is usually doing his shopping at the same time and before I know it we've been there 2 hours and I'm just in sheer panic :ohmy:
I think the best thing to do here is make your list beforehand and stick to getting just the items on that list.
The trouble is that my current diet isn't healthy and that's what I need help with. I keep eating the same foods and I'm having too much sugar and fat.
What about some ready made pasta dishes (pasta very gentle on the tum) - there is a nice one that is pasta, dry chicken and then some green leaves that they do at Tesco Express that is nutrionally balanced and not covered in sauce, that you could eat half of and put the other half in the fridge for the next day. Follow this with some hot stewed apple or fruit baby pudding with your yoghurt and the jobs a good un.
I would aim to eat normal ready meals but just eat smaller portions of them until you and tummy are ready for bigger portions.
Piglet - Thank you :hugs: And thanks for your message too :flowers: I tried to look online at the baby food - and I feel such shame really that I am reduced to this. Most of it seemed to be over 200 calories or it was really mushed up and looked horrible. The savoury ones do anyway! So I don't know.
Yes I agree the savoury ones don't look fab but the sweet ones don't look half bad.
Love Piglet :flowers:
Hi Karen :hugs:
Do you like salad? I buy the bags of mixed leaves, spinach, watercress and rocket, add some cubes of cheese to it and a dash of dressing and that's it. Very nutritious, not bloating and quite tasty too.
I remember when my 2 were small buying the Heinz chocolate puddings and the rice pudding and buying one of each for myself as well cos they were so nice! :blush:
Anyway, good to hear from you Karen and I agree with Piglet, take a list with you when you go shopping!
Love kate xx
Lisa - Thanks sis :hugs: I've messaged you so you know I am not all all upset with you. I know you care.
Thanks Karen, I have replied to that message.
I am sorry you are struggling so much :hugs: It might be worth asking the dietician for more help if you need it etc.
What you are eating doesn't sound unhealthy at all, the yoghurts are not bad either and give you much needed calcium.
It's difficult to make suggestions when you do not like so many things, or feel they are too many calories even when they are not, but the only way is to try things and see how you get on really isn't is. If you try something and do not like it that's fine. Houmous is lovely, when I first looked at it I never thought I'd like it either but was pleasantly surprised. You don't know unless you try eh?
I'm not hugely mad about quorn either but as I do not eat meat or fish I eat it, it's not bad stir fried with with some herbs or spices for flavour though. Or maybe you could give the fish a try again. Plain grilled fish is fine if you could not eat fish pie.
I agree with Piglet that making a shopping list could help alot. Try and plan what you will have at each meal and then you will know what you want once there.
Anyway just keep doing your best :hugs: I know all this is so hard for you and am proud of you for the effort you are making :flowers:
Lisa x
Thank you my friends as always for the support and suggestions :hugs:
Piglet - Thank you :hugs: I'm looking again at some of the smaller jars of baby fruit puree and the small dessert ones. I'd rather have very small portions of proper meals though - like your suggestion with the ready meal. The meals all look so big though :ohmy:
I'm trying to work something out with Stargazer's kind help for a couple of meals this week.
I do try to make a list but I panic when I'm at the supermarket and don't buy any of it. Or I get home and dump it all.
Kate - Thanks mate :hugs: Yes I do like salad but I guess I'm not supposed to fill myself up with it! I struggle with cheese but have been eating it a bit recently.
I hope those chocolate and rice puddings were tasty! Was that from the baby food range? :blush:
Lisa - Thanks sis :hugs:
I know I am difficult when it comes to food. I'm very fussy anyway and the eating disorder makes it worse :blush:
Maybe I'll check out houmous then. I just don't know what kind of taste it is. I imagine it to be like something with mayonaise which I really dislike a lot. I guess I am scared to try new food, or even to eat food I have eaten in the past :ohmy:
Today is difficult because I'll be alone for some time. I don't know yet whether I'll be alone until the early hours of the morning, or whether it will be until tomorrow night :ohmy: I'm just scared of being alone. I cannot keep food here overnight. :weep:
Karen xx
Hi Karen,
You're not being difficult, you have an eating disorder :hugs:
I know how hard it is for you to try new foods especially ones that scare you . However if you can just give a few a go and try just a little maybe. If you don't like it fine, then you will know.
Houmous is nothing like mayonaise I promise. I'm not keen on mayo anyway so I would not like houmous if it was. I can't really explain the taste, it is like chick peas really only nicer but if you have not had them it's hard to explain. It's not an overpowering taste though so there is not much to not like really.
I'm glad Stargazer is going to help with some meals - she is a star eh :yesyes:
Anyway thinking of you :hugs:
Lisa x
Paddington
03-12-07, 13:04
hi ss:hugs: Cant believe we all thought of baby foods at the same time..i thought maybe the toddler ones would be more palatable..oh and the choc puddin yum..one for baby .one for me ..one for me oopps:blush: i mean one for baby!You sure can micro a fish finger..takes 1 min 10 secs!That is for one ..1min 30 secs for two..they come out soft..and i have then on a sarnie!And do try the mash you can add protien int o it ..that dietician sounds usless..he should have given you a meal plan to aim at..you get better advice off us lot on here!:ohmy: The parsley in the spaghetti is barely noticable ..but then you can get the plain hienz spag hun..i dont like hoops at all:lac: too tomatoey for me..the long spag is better i think!Anf you can get microwavable rice too now..you could chop a quorn sausage into it:) Piglet is right hun.make a list b4 you go..also the suggestion of seeds and nuts is a very good one hun:flowers: I know it does not address the eating disorder itself hun or all the underlying reasond behind it but if some of these hits and tips help you stay relatively safe and healthier it is worth giving it a go:) ..OH ,and Stargazer??I will be behind Piglet at tea time..but i must have the bigger portion as i ....,well because i am greedy!:D :hugs: Did i say yu can micro quorn sausages Karen?I do ,1 min should do it..i put sliced musheroom in a dish with the saus undernesth ..a drop of water..micro for a minute ..then put it on ww bread..bingo..a saus and musheroom sarnie..all be it small and fat free:D Oh and soup..so easy hun..ww are only single serving too:flowers: Lord i should be soooooo slim shouldnt i..perhaps i should listen to my own advice,hey hun:huh: Thanks for askinf how i am hun..not to good today..or last night ..but still..so lovely to make contact with friends:flowers: Love Paddie.xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Yes Karen, the pud's WERE from the baby pureed range :blush::blush:
And, yes, they were tasty LOL
Hope today is going well for you :hugs:
Love Kate xx
Hi Karen , the quorn sausages are considered a low fat food and taste lovely with spagettie and mash. Do you like the muller rice yogurts ? they are low fat again but very tastey and come in different flavours.
Where do you go shopping ? Cos I get more panicky in big shops , so maybe a smaller shop is the place to buy your food ?
hope you feel better soon
xxx
Thinking of you Karen :hugs:
Lisa x
You're quiet again Karen, how's it going?
Thinking of you :hugs:
Lisa x
honeybee3939
04-12-07, 23:06
:hugs: :hugs: :hugs:
Love
:hugs:
Andrea
xxxxxxxxxx
How are things going hun??? :hugs:
Piglet :flowers:
Paddington
05-12-07, 12:43
big hugs karen:hugs: :hugs: love Paddie.xxxxxxxxxxx
Has anyone heard from Karen:shrug:
Im getting worried:weep:
Luv Kaz x x x:hugs:
I've not heard anything Kaz. She was online on facebook yesterday though I think.
Lisa x
Heard from Karen by text just now.
Karen hun I am so sorry things are such a struggle at present - I do wish they gave a little more in the way of emotional support for you while you are trying to eat normally again.
Keep plodding away at it hun - remind me again what if any help you are getting regarding from the NHS at the mo.
Love Piglet :flowers:
Hi All
I'm sorry I haven't been posting regularly again :blush: Thank you for the messages of support :hugs:
At the moment I'm struggling :weep: There is a lot of pressure on me to gain weight this week but if anything I want more than ever to stop eating. I'm scared of food and scared of eating. It always gets to this stage and goes out of control :weep:
Every time I start eating the cycle starts again - I try to eat normally but it slowly turns to bingeing :blush: :weep: and I gain weight. Then I reach a point where I've got to take back control before my weight goes too high so I start restricting.
This last time I virtually stopped eating and my weight dropped lower than ever before but now that is the target for me. I don't want to gain more weight :weep:
I hate the person I'm turning into since I started eating. I'm really horrible to people and selfish and just a really bad person . I feel the need to punish myself. I hate myself so much :weep:
Sorry :sofa:
Karen xx
Thanks for your support Piglet :hugs:
Sorry I've been withdrawing into myself again :sad: I'm just not coping very well and although I am not actually alone it seems like I am most of the time.
Keep plodding away at it hun - remind me again what if any help you are getting regarding from the NHS at the mo.
That's the point really - I'm not getting any help but then any 'help' I'm offered doesn't help me. It's just more pressure and I feel like others are taking control again.
I could ask my doctor to chase up the social worker and CPN but I don't want to see them. So it wouldn't help.
I'm on a waiting list for an assessment for some sort of therapy but I don't know how long the waiting list is or even if I'll get the help I need :shrug: I just don't have any trust in the system anymore.
Just wish I could afford to see the private therapist I was seeing before :sad:.
Karen xx
Dying_Swan
05-12-07, 17:48
Karen.
So sorry to hear you are feeling so low. I think you are doing so well and making such a fantastic effort. Keep at it hun
:hugs::hugs::hugs::hugs::hugs::hugs:
xxx :flowers:
I can quite see your dilemma love - it's hard for us all to deal with our issues without some assistance. Like you say this is the stumbling block everytime isn't it - you start well but then it gets abit too much and you need a helping hand over that hurdle.:hugs:
I cannot understand it - why can't there be proper therapy for you, it's constantly treating the symptoms and not the cause isn't it.:lac:
I know your doctor is lovely but does she really have no power to get you the help as a matter of urgency and I mean constructive help not just about re-feeding.
Love Piglet :flowers:
I cannot understand it - why can't there be proper therapy for you, it's constantly treating the symptoms and not the cause isn't it.:lac:
Yes I agree with that too. It is so wrong this is not happening :lac:
You're not a bad person Karen and do not need punishing :lac: You're a nice, lovely person who is ill and deserves lots of TLC :hugs:
I so wish I knew what to suggest or what to say to help, am thinking of you lots :flowers:
Lisa x
Wish I could help Karen:hugs:
Glad you are still around tho:hugs:
Luv Kaz x x x:hugs:
Hi Karen,
I just popped in to see how you are doing.
Keep on fighting this hun because you have been doing so well and I'm really proud of you.
I'm sending you some great big extra squishy hugs. :hugs: :hugs: :hugs:
Thinking of you. :flowers:
Love and hugs from shoegal xxx
Paddington
06-12-07, 14:20
Hi Hun:hugs: it is very frustrating the way the drs etc 'treat' anorexia.As i said on face book i watched a progg about it..i wish everyone had seen it..it really is all about making folk eat more calories but with little thought as to the cause!And the food is unhealthy too..i understand that the weight has to be gained but cakes?biscuits?etc..Calories could be ingested by including healther and just as calorific food..i should know..i eat a very healthy diet ,,but far too much of it.:blush: :ohmy: You are doing your best at the mo hun..i wish the dieticion had given you a proper eating plan hun..maybe we could all get out heads together and do it for you:flowers: Have a think about it:hugs: Love Paddie.xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Lilith1980
06-12-07, 14:48
Hi Karen, I dont think we've spoken before but I suffered with anorexia for 4 years. I didnt go into hospital but I can appreciate how frustrating it must be to have people around you, trying to control the situation.
My Mum took me to our family GP without evening asking my permission they talked about me like I wasnt there. I experienced such feelings of panic at the thought of them trying to control me and control what was happening.
As Paddington said, some times these Drs dont deal with the situation correctly. Yes you have to gain weight, but eating is the most frightening experience for an anorexic (or bullimc). And giving them unhealthy food is even worse really, as its bound to have negative psychological effects.
I took the steps to recover a couple of years ago now. I had just had enough of the whole damn thing but it wasn't easy and I had to force myself to eat. It was a very scary time and I had a lot of relapses but I just wanted to pull myself out.
I went to see a nutritionist privately - she gave me a meal plan, and it was very healthy. Fish, pulses, brown rice that sort of thing. I'm sure, as Paddington said, you could put your heads together and come up with a meal plan to suit you.
One of the most important things I read is that you think you are in control of this but its the illness that is controlling you. So maybe, rather than thinking of the Drs taking control of you, they are taking control away from the illness and helping to put it back in your court.
Have you heard of this site hun www.something-fishy.org (http://www.something-fishy.org) Its a site for people suffering from eating disorders and the familes of sufferers too. It really helped me reach the point where I wanted to recover. Maybe you will find something on there that you can make a connection with. Although dont leave us! We love having you here :)
Just wanted to share and say that you're doing so well, even though you think you're not hun xxxx :hugs:
Thank you all for writing and for your support :hugs:
Hugs for you all - Lisa, Kaz, Paddie, Piglet, Ray, Shoegirl, Lilith :hugs: I hope I remembered everyone.
Lilith - Thank you for sharing. It is good to hear from someone who has recovered. Most of the people I know are still ill and go through one hospital admission after another.
I do lack the will to recover - not because I want to stay ill but because eating terrifies me too much. Weight gain terrifies me so much.
Piglet - Thank you mate :hugs: No, I don't think my doctor can get me the help I need as a matter of urgency. My GP, the CMHT, th psychiatrist will all act if I don't gain weight but this 'help' will be refeeding in the local hospital ward.
Paddie - Hugs my friend :hugs: I too wish more people could see what so-called 'treatment' and 'help' means. The programme you watched sounds like it illustrated what happens.
it really is all about making folk eat more calories but with little thought as to the cause!And the food is unhealthy too..i understand that the weight has to be gained but cakes?biscuits?etc..Calories could be ingested by including healther and just as calorific food..
Exactly my point really. As you say I need a healthy way of eating, not just more calories. In hospital I'd just be re-fed with cakes, biscuits and unhealthy puddings.
I need a proper plan because I am floundering here alone. The dietician just said to keep eating what I'm having and add a snack meal in. But I'm not eating healthily at the moment. I'm in blind panic.
I should know..i eat a very healthy diet...
Yes you do. I think you know more than so-called 'experts' :hugs:
i wish the dieticion had given you a proper eating plan hun..maybe we could all get out heads together and do it for you:flowers: Have a think about it
Maybe you could :hugs: It gas to be better than what I'm doing now.
All help appreciated :hugs:
Karen xxx
Oooh it's just so frustrating - it's like getting blood out of a stone with the NHS over this. Why do things have to be like this. It's so flippin plain to all that you need a healthy diet plan and some emotional support - how hard is that to organize for goodness sake.
Karen shall we all pick a day and give you our healthy eating plan I shall pick Mondays for you:
Breakfast - a small bowl of cereal like Special K Medley and some semi-skimmed milk, maybe add a few raspberries on the top (I buy the frozen ones at Tesco at this time of the year.
Lunch - Baked beans on toast followed by a small banana.
Dinner - Two fishfingers, any frozen vegatables of your choice and possibly a very small quantity of mashed potato or potato. Followed by a yoghurt.
Snacks could be fruit or special K cereal bars (97Kcal)
Drinks of fruit juice watered down with plain water through the day!!!
Now this presumes you have indeed bought the odd cooking utensil by now???!!!!!
Now if other people give you a daily planner too then you should find amongst the 7 days some things that you like and you can swap the menu around accordingly.
Love Piglet :flowers:
Hi Karen,
Piglets suggestions sound great :yesyes:
I also remember I sent you on facebook a few weeks back loads and loads of suggestions for each meal of the day and snacks if required so you could try some of those too maybe. I think many of my suggestions would have needed you to have some pans/dishes etc though. I think you're going to have to get some pots and pans if you haven't already? otherwise you are very limited in what you can do. I never use a microwave so am no good at making suggestions for that.
Definitely worth telling the dietician you need a proper written plan too of what to eat each day maybe, or even get your doc to ask him for this?
Thinking of you :hugs:
Lisa x
Hi Karen,
Piglets suggestions sound great. Here's a few ideas of my own:
Breakfast: one glass of fruit smoothie with one slice of toast with maybe marmite or peanut butter on top (or whatever you fancy), or a bowl of cereal of your choice.
Lunch: Salad with prawns or ham with a slice of bread and butter or some baby new potatoes. You can buy ready made salads in pots with toppings or chicken pieces in so you don't need to worry about having utensils or doing washing up afterwards. You can also buy new potatoes in tins which you can put in a dish and microwave. If you don't fancy salad and potatoes you can buy Italian style ready to eat pasta salads in pots which are quite nutritious. Have some fruit or some sort of cereal bar for desert.
Dinner: Boil in the bag fish in sauce (buy them frozen and cook in a pan of boiling water). Serve with a vegetable of your choice and baby new potatoes. You can put the veg and the new potatoes in the same pan as the bag of fish which means you won't need lots of pots or utensils. For desert have a yogurt or some fruit.
Snacks: Fruit, cereal bars, yogurts, build up milkshakes (I know you don't like the idea of these but they are great when you don't feel like eating) and crackers and cheese. These sorts of things will keep for a while so you can have them when you fancy them.
*I suggested the tinned new potatoes with both meals because you could buy one tin and have a few new potatoes with your lunch and dinner. They don't need to be washed as they are ready prepared and they just need to be heated in a pan of hot water so they are really simple to do. If you are cooking something else in a pan you can just throw them in as well which means less washing up and less equipment needed. You can have them with all kinds of meals and you can jazz them up by serving them with different dressings and toppings.
I hope this helps a little bit.
Love and hugs from shoegal xxx
Hi Karen:D
This sounds like a top idea:yesyes:
But I think it would help if you could let us know what utensils you have???
Also what foods you cannot eat???
That way we can come up with some meals that you will be able to prepare and eat!!
Luv Kaz x x x:hugs:
Thanks for all the messages and suggestions.
Kaz - Thanks hun :hugs:
But I think it would help if you could let us know what utensils you have??? Also what foods you cannot eat???
It would certainly help if the meals suggested are things I can eat. Where to start with what I can't have though :blush: :wacko:
Firstly, I don't have any pots or pans or cooking utensils. I do have a limited supply of disposable microwave bowls and foil oven trays.
As far as food is concerned I don't know where to start. The biggest thing for me is portion size. I have been eating very little amounts of food - like one yoghurt is a whole meal for me, or half a slice of low calorie bread with cheese or jam. I cannot even manage a whole small can of beans or spaghetti at present and that's without toast.
I don't currently eat meat at all. I struggle with fish but sometimes have managed some cod loin.
My particular dislikes are most sauces and mayonnaise. I don't like mushrooms, onions, prawns, sweetcorn, rice... the list is so long :blush:
I don't want to be negative - just realistic.
Shoegirl - Thanks for your sugguestions :hugs: I hadn't thought about canned potatoes. Do they taste like real potatoes? I can only heat stuff in the microwave.
Lisa - Thanks sis :hugs: I still have that message and as you say it is the cooking that is a problem - both with my anorexia and my OCD.
Piglet :hugs: I think your menu sounds healthy and is something to aim for maybe. Currently I'm not eating anywhere near that amount of food. I have a small bowl of Bran Flakes with a few raspberries.
After that my day goes wrong. Lunch isn't more than half a slice of bread with something or if I am really stuck I have half a packet of WW fat free crisps. My diet is awful.
Dinner never amounts to anything and I get my daily calorie intake up with breakfast and a yoghurt for a snack after a non-existant dinner. Today's calorie intake seems to be coming from breakfast and two yoghurts - one for lunch and another for dinner because I'm in a panic.
Another problem is that I don't have a freezer and cannot keep food here when I am alone. I have a small freezer shelf between two of us when Nigel is here.
I saw my doctor today and the first question she asked was whether I am struggling. But in the next breath she mentioned the CMHT so I didn't want to say too much. Having the social worker and psychiatric nurse involved will merely add to my stress :sad:
She also said I look like I have lost weight although her scales showed I had maintained. I have eaten less this week. I am struggling but I don't know what to do.
She said to keep trying and that I need to eat more. I know that but I am so distressed by what I'm already eating :weep: I can't help worrying about Christmas either. There is no way I can cope with being alone for several days. I don't cope with being alone for even one day at the moment. I don't know what is going to happen.
Karen xx
Hi Karen:D
Let me give it some thought will see what I can come up with:yesyes:
Kaz x x x:hugs:
Thanks Kaz :hugs:
Oh... I forgot to mention that tuna is a particular dislike of mine :blush: Sorry. I know I am very fussy:oopsie:
Karen xx
Karen:D
Was just devising some bits for you and had a thought!!!
What facilities have you got??
Ie microwave oven grill toaster etc??
Not being nosey but want to try and give you something do able!!!!
Kaz x x x:hugs:
Thanks Kaz :hugs:
What facilities have you got??
Ie microwave oven grill toaster etc??
I know you are not being nosey mate :hugs:
I use microwave mostly. I have an oven and grill but only foil disposable trays. The problem for me is having to do lots of preparing and cooking - and that's without my OCD about cleaning up and re-using stuff that's had food in it :blush:
I appreciate your help :hugs:
Karen xx
Hi Karen:D
Ok some ideas to go on with till I know what facilities you have!!
How about on a slice of bread:
Tinned salmon or tuna
Fishpaste or meatpaste(in tiny jars about 40p)
On toast...or forget the toast:
Cottage cheese plain or flavoured(you can either put it cold on toast or put it on toast and pop under grill)
Scrambled egg 1 egg, splash milk I know you wont use butter etc
Mix with fork and micro for about 1 min
Have on toast or on its own
Also you can have egg on toast
If you break egg into saucer or small dish and add a bit of butter (no I know thats a no no but I think a splash of water would work)
Pierce the yolk with a fork or whatever
Micro till set about 1 min
Also (if you are still awake)
how about a small pot of custard (about size of a yogurt) with some apple baby food???
Birds whisk n serve semolina is good too Boil kettle tip on powder and whisk with fork and enjoy!!!!
How about the pot noodle things you can buy???
Boil kettle tip on leave a few mins and eat with fork!!!
Heinz do a range of soups called big soup.....have a look see what you think
And finally as has already been suggested hummuos and veg sticks!!!
I never fancied hummous but had it at a friends house and its nice!!!
Whew right hope that helps and when you let me know about oven etc I will post more ideas
Luv Kaz x x x:hugs:
Hey there have been some good suggestions mate haven't there - are there any you able to adapt and that you like???
Love Piglet :flowers:
Hi Karen,
I am leaving NMP or at least taking a break from posting for now - just wanted to say though that I am not abandoning you in any way, I will still contact you on facebook instead and will still be there for you. I probably will not read here often as I want to have a proper break from here and I feel so guilty for not being able to stay here and support you here. I have sent you a pm to explain.
Just wanted to put it here too so you and everyone else knows I am not deserting you.
Thinking of you :hugs:
Lisa x
Dying_Swan
08-12-07, 16:42
Been thinking over this and am trying to come up with some more suggestions.
Try the humous - if you don't like it, try a different dip. I know you said you're not keen on Mayo, so perhaps salsa or guacamole etc. When I was younger I didn't like humous, but I used to mix it with plain yogurt and liked that :)
Rye Bread/crackers/wholemeal bread with Cottage/low fat cream cheese and a sliced tomato/cucumber.
The egg and tuna/salmon are really good ideas as they are packed with protein and very easy. Microwaved scrambled egg is surprisingly yummy!
I know you said you don't have utensils, but was not sure whether you had any at all? I was wondering if you just bought one thing, perhaps it would be manageable. If you can, buy yourself a small vegetable knife - just a cheapo will do. I suppose a microwaveable bowl (pyrex etc) would be really useful too.
You can buy little pouches of pasta/rice which just need heating. Perhaps half one of these with half a sachet of sauce? I know that pasta is filling so you'd not want a whole one just yet.
Cup a soup? Supernoodles? Really easy ...
I'm not sure why you became Vegetarian. If it's due to not liking meat/animal worries, I totally respect that and won't suggest any meat! I just wondered if it was due to concern about the calorie content in meat - if so, Turkey is incredibly lean and pretty tasty :) I'll hold off with turkey suggestions though as I know you aren't eating meat right now!
Ok I'm going to stop now as my keyboard is falling to pieces and it's getting quite difficult.
I really hope you're doing ok Karen and things are looking up a little for you.
Big :hugs::hugs::hugs::hugs::hugs:
xxxxx :flowers:
Thank you all for the suggestions :hugs:
Kazzie - What a list! :flowers: Thanks mate :hugs:
I think maybe egg is something I could try. I always do it wrong when I try to scramble it so maybe I'll try microwaving it with a dash of water. Just need to buy some now.
I'll maybe try houmous too. I'm really fussy about sauces and dips.
Soup has been suggested a few times. I don't know why I've got such an issue with it. I guess it's a bit like how I feel about just getting calories from foods like yoghurt and those build up drinks :blush:
Oh did I mention not liking tuna :blush: and not eating meat :blush:
Thanks for helping. There some things I can try.
Shoegirl - Thank you too :hugs:
I'll try the houmous. Is low fat soft cheese healthy? I've tried cottage cheese in the past but didn't like it.
Soup seems worth a try,
I do eat weight w danish brown bread and sometimes I have Rakusen's Fat Free Matzos crackers but get sruck with what to have on them, so low fat soft cheese might work.
I stopped eating meat because I simply went off it. Perhaps I could try turkey or chicken breast meat again. I'm struggling trying to get protein other ways. I'm worried about calories too :blush:
Some useful suggestions from everyone. Sorry to anyone I've missed or who has written private messages. I will catch up with replying. I'm just not feeling too well at the moment and I'm very tired.
Lisa - Got your PM sis and will catch up with you on Facebook :hugs:
Just want to say you are all great and thank you very much :hugs:
Karen xx
I'm finding it hard today.
I managed to have some breakfast of Bran Flakes and fruit (no milk) but I'm going to be alone tonight and possibly tomorrow.
I'm scared and don't know how I'll cope. I know I won't keep food here overnight and I doubt I'll eat until tomorrow night now.
I no longer trust myself with food :blush: :weep:
Karen xx
Lilith1980
09-12-07, 14:51
Hi hun
Do you have a shop near you where you can get food? I'm just thinking, if you dont feel comfortable with having food in the house, could you pop to the shop when its time for the next meal?
I know that sounds like a hassle but it might relieve the anxiety of having food in the house?
And if you plan exactly what you're having before you head to the shops you can just grab what you need and leave. I say this because I used to get anxious when going into shops to buy food.
Hun we are here for you if you need to talk. Well done for having breakfast, dont beat yourself up for not having milk, you had something and thats what counts. And it was nice and healthy too :)
xxx
Well done Karen:yesyes:
Onwards and upwards now:yesyes:
We can beat this together:yesyes:
Luv Kaz x x x:hugs:
honeybee3939
10-12-07, 10:56
Hi Karen
Just sending you some positive vibes for this week hun:hugs: :hugs: :hugs:
Love
:hugs:
Andrea
xxxxxx
:hugs: :hugs: for you:hugs: :hugs:
Hey Karen, :hugs:
Sorry I've not been around much. I'm having my own troubles at the moment.
How's things going?
Jim :hugs:
Just to let you know I've been given no choice other than to go into hospital for refeeding - 8 or more weeks they said - on the general hospital ward.
Sorry can't say more as they are waiting to go. :weep: :weep:
Karen xx
Have just texted you. :hugs:
Piglet :flowers:
Oh Karen I am so sorry to hear this :hugs:
I know I am not meant to be posting at the moment but I just had to reply when I saw your post :hugs:
I really wish you all the best, I know it will be hard :hugs: - I so hope you get some proper support and therapy while there too and not just refeeding.
Thinking of you :flowers:
Lisa x
Oh Karen, I know this was your biggest fear.
I so hope that they also tackle the emotional issues surrounding your anorexia.
Thinking of you :hugs:
Love Kate xxx
:hugs: :hugs: :hugs: :hugs: Karen,
I hope things turn out ok hun.
Jim :hugs: :hugs:
Karen I know this wasn't what you wanted. Have some big hugs from me
:hugs: :hugs: :hugs: :hugs: :hugs:
karen,
Please try to see this as the start of a new phase in your life.A chance for you to take advantage of the help on offer.The chance of a better,healthier life for you.I know it may not seem like that now but give yourself a break and let other people-who clearly have your best interests at heart-look after you and restore you to good health.
Everyone at the site will be rooting for you!!!!!!!!!!!!
Take care
Love,
Chalky
honeybee3939
11-12-07, 18:53
:hugs: :hugs: :hugs:
Andrea
xxxxxxx
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