Scared of these thoughts

[yeppy]

Hi everybody this is my first post so a bit scary but hope there's someone out there that can help!!

Last week the scariest thing happened to me and its really affected me badly. All day i was feeling really strange and i just couldnt shake this feeling of panic. By the evening it had turned into a full scale panic attack. i'd never had one before and it was horrible. I dont know why but i was just convinced that i was going to murder my parents or kill myself. They were trying to convince me they were just thoughts and i wouldnt do it but i was so scared that in the end they called the doctor out. i was calmed down with valium but the whole thing terrified me.

The next day me and my mum went to the doctors who perscribed anti depressants and has referred me to see someone. Im still waiting for the appointment but in the meantime i'm still plagued with these thoughts.

Before last week the only hint of these thoughts i've ever had was maybe if i read about murders or phycos and and i think to myself "god how awful if i turned out like that". but since my panic attack i cant get thoughts of murder and going insane out of my head. Im panicing all the time about the thought of carrying out these awful thoughts but also when a thought does pop into my head its as if those sort of acts are normal. im just traumatised. please help!!

[mum2four]

I have been dealing with these sort of thought's since i was a young kid and just finaly at 28y am on meds that are making me feel better. I see the phycologist in 8days.

I dontn how helpfull this site will be on these symptom's. i do know that another site I use as well have a far better understanding of these symtom's if you havn't already been there and want to go there i have found many people there like me. It good to be fully understood.

http://www.stuckinadoorway.co.uk/default.asp

[vernon]

hi yeppy welcome to the site. Sorry how you are feeling but these feelings will pas they are quite normal with anxiety and panic and have had the same myself. Lots of people here feel the same and am sure you will get plenty of help and make good friends here. take care and keep us informed on how you are. Vernon

[nomorepanic]

Yeppy

Welcome aboard. These are quite common thoughts amongst anxious people.

Mum2four has referred you to an OCD website but I don't think this is OCD. You will find that loads of us on here have had these thoughts before. I will try and find some previous posts for cos these are only thoughts and not instructions or actions.

Hope you get some support on here.

Nicola

[rozza]

Hey,

It's great that you've started getting help for this. I struggled in silence with my thoughts that I was going to kill myself, someone else that I love or do something awful for 18 months and truly thought I was psychotic. I still get the thoughts despite being on anti-depressants for 3 months and I am seeing a psychologist regularly and although I still have some scary thoughts I am confident most of the time that I'm not going to do anything stupid, although I do still get convinced sometimes I am just going to lose control. Try and get CBT, that is the talking therapy of choice at the moment for this and if you want to have a look at the link I posted about this when I first came on here have a look at this Hey, new here, thought I'd say hi! And help!

If you wanna chat sometime for some reassurance and handy hints let me know!!

Roz

'All I want is to be normally insane' Marlon Brando

[nomorepanic]

Here you go ...

Strange thoughts....Anyone else?

what if I kill someone?

odd thoughts...

obsessional negative thoughts

Horrible thoughts

Morbid thoughts


Nicola

[alexis]

Hi Yeppy and welcome to the site. Like you say these are just thoughts and as you get on the road to recovery you will realise that they are just that. I had very similar thoughts, I never actually thought I would murder anybody but my thoughts were irrational.
i have also had many panic attacks and one ended me up in hospital and threw me back for weeks.
Are you taking the antidepressants, im sure once you see somebody things will improve, they did with me.
I have been on other websites and even looked at the one mum2four suggested prior to coming here, but I have definitly not got ocd so did not find this that useful.That doesnt mean you wont of course.I am sure you will find everything you need and more here in the way of advice and support, take care and have a good look around.

love from Alexisxx

If I help one person today it was worth getting up.

[mum2four]

OCD or not I feel that web site is beter at dealing with thought's like that I have tryed getting help here for thought's like that I found less understanding. Not that this site has not been helpfull for other symptom's cause it been a huge help and people on this site have told me look els where as well.

[rozza]

This is for mum2four really. Thanks for the link to that Stuck in a Doorway OCD website, it's just like here but more focused on the scary obsessional thoughts if you see what I mean? I have only just registered and already I feel like there are actually people that are going through exactly the same thing as me. WOW!

Roz

'All I want is to be normally insane' Marlon Brando

[Meg]

Yeppy

Sorry to hear you've bene struggling with such upsetting thoughts. Its is so scary when you first have them and honestly believe that they may be true.

However, as you've already read here , thoughts such as these are completely usual and are a large part of anxiety.

Anxiety is fear in a disproportionate amount to the trigger and thought cycles are at the basis of a large part of controlling or propagating anxiety.

We all have about 50000 thoughts a day and usually they are about all manner of things and we don't really pay much ettention to them unless trying to concentrate on something or you get a song stuck in your head that you cannot shift.

What you are currently experiencing is exactly the same but this time the thought has a meaning that frightens you and you latch onto it and examine it so carefully that it brings it more energy and thus keeps it alive and repeating itself time and again and it scares you more so it becomes a roundabout.

We all have these everyday of our life pre and post anxiety too - grr I wish he would drop dead .. etc but we don't mean it at all and don't give it another thought.

But when we know we're already struggling to cope we take things so much more seriously and thus what is in reality just another thought passing through, it grabs our full scared attention and we analyse and concentrate on it to the enth degree.

You will get past these and learn that they are temporary as your anxiety is acute .

Thoughts not instructions

Energy follows thought

Here are some more old threads just so that you don't feel you are in this alone ..

http://www.nomorepanic.co.uk/symptoms.htm


First Steps to overcoming Panic and Anxiety

odd thoughts...
Strange thoughts....Anyone else?
Silly thoughts
strange things!

I'm new!
http://www.nomorepanic.org.uk/lounge...?TOPIC_ID=1299
Madness
mentally ill?! worries
Its happening again !

Wherever you find comfort and help is where is good for you.




Meg
www.anxietymanagementltd.com

Your anxiety is the human representation of the pictures that you paint using your many vivid colours of revolving and reoccurring thoughts.
How big is your gallery ?